Goodbye 08! Thank GOD.

So, we are saying Good Bye to '08...
Let me rephrase, Good FREAKING Bye '08.
What an exhausting year!! BUT, amidst the grievances that can be attributed to this year, there are also some great things and experiences, as with every year.
Probably one of my favorite things I did this year happened only a mere three weeks ago when I ran the White Rock half-marathon! Sadly, I have no photos yet... but I will post when I do. I am mostly proud because I literally trained MAYBE once a week and really did not run at all for two weeks before the race! I have no idea why. I think I have been a bit lethargic lately. Anyway, I finished the race in 2:28! Which basically comes down to a 11:22 minute mile. I'm pretty happy with that considering my training could barely be considered training, at any stretch of the imagination.

Well, since my other big, exciting news is that I have a suh-weet iPhone now, I finally am able to take pictures and, drum roll, POST THEM TO MY BLOG!! TA-DAH!!

So, before I get to posting, here is a Christmas breakdown -
Reese got a mountain of Princess clothing, Princess, slippers, Princess wands, crowns, earrings, jewels, etc. Pretty much just take a consensus of every item you own, attach a Princess theme to it, and Reese probably got one for Christmas. You think I'm kidding.
Niles got me a $100 gift certificate to Luke's Locker so I can get some really serious running shoes! I'm so excited. Plus, he is paying for me to go back to boot camp. That means, I will have to stop being lazy, and start getting some muscle back on this body!! I'm also super excited about it. I need to start 2009 off on an inspiring note, and boot camp is the perfect way to do that, as I already know well.

So, now that the year is coming to a close, it is funny to look back on how differently this year is ending than how it began. Completely different in nearly every single way. I really do love change, even as it intimidates me and I can get a bit anxious about the "unknown"... But I don't like to stay stagnant for too long, and if 2009 continues along the pace that the second half of 08 did, than it is going to be a fast-moving year!! I am truly excited about the coming year, and I am very excited about all the possibilities on the horizon. SO... going out with Reesey's best friend today was the perfect way to close out the year.

Presenting, more of the Reese and Emma Show (via Central Market & iPhone)



And here are some pics from our day at the library. Reese loves the computers because they have "Reesey Games" and she can sit there for hours.


Tonight we are off to hang out with some friends and Reesey's boyfriends (there are so many!) so it will be a nice way to say goodbye to 2008, BUT WE WILL DEFINITELY MISS Niles!! It is back to our usual routine of not spending New Years Eve together! =)

CHEERS TO EVERYONE AND HAPPY NEW YEAR!!

Girls and Boys

This morning, after my long blog episode below, I watched as my two favorite people displayed two similar and yet distinct characteristics of women/girls and men/boys. Very interesting...

Niles, my nearly 28-year-old husband of 6 years is sick. But apparently so sick that it has reduced him to an infantile state. Apparently it is normal for adult men to regress substantially when inflicted by a sore throat and "sore skin" (niles' words). =)

Reese was happy as a clam when she woke up this morning. Smiling and content, she walked over to the kitchen table and started coloring while I made her breakfast: blueberry waffles and strawberries. As soon as I brought her food over, on her pretty pink plate with her pink plastic flamingo fork, she immediately stopped coloring, pulled her security blankie near and pushed away her plate of food. Bewildered and a bit frustrated I must admit, I chose to ignore the sudden moodswing and continue on with the rest of our morning routine.

Not content with that small display of discontent, Reese hopped down from her booster seat at the table and walked over to Niles, lying desperately on the couch. She stood there staring at him for a few minutes, with a mixture of emotions on her face, and without warning put her tiny hands on each cheek and burst into tears.

Eventually she made her way back to her plate of carbs and sugary syrup and went right back to smiling.

I tell you, this is not too different from an average evening between Niles and I.

Emphatic Confidence

I know all my posts lately have been either serious or boring, so you'll have to forgive me. I don't have enough brainpower lately to be humorous or creative, unless it pertains to event-planning. =)

But I just had to write about this... I am reading My Utmost for His Highest, which has quickly become one of my favorite books (devo) of all time. I have gone back to it sporadically over the years, but I think this year has been the most consistent. It is full of so much wisdom and depth. Sometimes a little too much depth, and I don't quite grasp it, but most of the time it offers me some revelation that I have desperately needed.

I have been feeling a little burnt out lately. It seems as though most of my life now is CARES, which is awesome because I love it, but it is so easy to forget about life outside of our community. It's like I forget about my whole world, and all I can focus on are giveaways, donations, details and whether residents will attend and whether they will have a good time... I completely lose my bearings and friends turn into babysitters. =) I feel heavily convicted about it all at the moment because I can see that I've gotten out of balance. Thank God that He cares enough about me and loves me enough to reveal to me when I'm not giving enough to my relationships and my family.

Anyways, back to my devotion this morning...
Since I have been feeling all this heavy stuff, it was so fantastic to read these crucial points in today's Utmost:
"We have to battle through our moods into absolute devotion to the Lord Jesus, to get out of the hole-and-corner business of our experience into abandoned devotion to Him.
"... our faith must be built in strong emphatic confidence in Him"
"He is made unto us 'wisdom, and righteousness, and sanctification, and redemption'. How can we talk of making a sacrifice for the Son of God?!"
"All our fears are wicked, and we fear because we will not nourish ourselves in our faith. How can anyone who is identified with Jesus Christ suffer from doubt or fear?"

Seriously! How can I act as if I'm going to go each day and make such a sacrifice for God by believing Him and loving Him. ?! God has given me the greatest gift anyone can ever receive... He sees me as righteous and sanctified, faultless because of the gift of Jesus. If I do fear or doubt (which I do very often) it is absolutely because I have not nourished myself in my faith - in my God-given freedom!!

Anyways, I'm not great at writing articulately about things that move my spirit, but maybe you get something out of this that I didn't, or maybe you'll just have to read it yourself, because doesnt everyone own this book?!?! All I know is that I got a good kick in the butt this morning.

7th Wedding

Okay, kids... Last weekend was my seventh wedding to bridesmaid.
It was probably one of, if not THE best dress I have ever worn in a wedding, which was awesome. But can I say, no matter how much I love a bridesmaid dress, IT WILL NEVER BE WORN AGAIN! It just will not happen.

The wedding was my friend Brie's. She married her boyfriend of 4 years, John, and they are absolutely perfect together. She looked more beautiful than I have ever seen her. Briezer is so funny, so true to herself, and completely without an ounce of pretension. She is such a blast to be around and I felt so honored to be in her wedding, considering that just 3 years ago we had never hung out before, even though I have known her for years. CHEERS TO BRIE!!

REHEARSAL DINNER






GETTING HER SCRAPBOOK WE GAVE HER


Mere, Amy and Becca




BEFORE THE WEDDING










Me and Mere


With Brie's nephew, Little Vincent


The Wedding and Reception!













And for those of you who know to ask... the flowers were beautiful! =)

My Husband is so smart.

You should go read his blog...
Blog Action Day!
I had no idea what the whole Blog Action Day thing was, but Niles informed me that you are supposed to take one day to write all about one particular topic... for whatever reason.
Anyways, today's topic was poverty, and my brilliant husband wrote a great blog.
Check it out!!!
www.7zeroes.com

There's an Election going on?!

Election from Amir on Vimeo.

In Every Season, You Are Still God

If you don't already love Hillsong and immediately buy every CD that comes out, please at least buy their latest, This Is Our God. So far, this is absolutely my favorite. It is so powerful and everytime I listen, I feel the presence of God so strongly, and feel so refreshed and touched by God.
"Desert Song" is currently my favorite. The part in italics towards the bottom is such a great reminder to me that I have nothing to fear, nothing to be ashamed of, nothing to be depressed about, because ultimately God is God, and no matter what is going on around me or even IN me, He never changes, He never fails. No matter what mistakes I make, nothing can or will ever separate me from Him!!

DESERT SONG

This is my prayer in the desert
When all that's within me feels dry
This is my prayer in my hunger and need
My God is the God who provides

This is my prayer in the fire
In weakness or trial or pain
There is a faith proved
Of more worth than gold
So refine me Lord through the flame

I will bring praise
I will bring praise
No weapon formed against me shall remain
I will rejoice
I will declare
God is my victory and He is here

This is my prayer in the battle
When triumph is still on its way
I am a conqueror and co-heir with Christ
So firm on His promise I'll stand

ALL OF MY LIFE
IN EVERY SEASON
YOU ARE STILL GOD
I HAVE A REASON TO SING
I HAVE A REASON TO WORSHIP!!!

This is my prayer in the harvest
When favor and providence flow
I know I'm filled to be emptied again
The seed I've received I will sow

So, Reese has been on a big sticker frenzy lately. She loves them, and they keep her occupied for quite some time, which is fantiastic.
So, at Target this morning, I saw they had a bunch of stickers on sale for 42 cents. (Seriously, 42 cents? why 42?)
Anyways, I grabbed some fish, some Tinkerbells, and some cute bunnies.

Only later when we were at home and Reese was sticking Bunny stickers all over Niles did we realize what those cute bunnies were communicating to our sweet girl.
Here's a small sample for you:







"Hi. Cram It." ???? Who the heck writes these things?!

So Niles kept me fully entertained reading off each sticker as Reese stuck them onto his arm. Here's a few of my favorites:

"look how nice I am not laughing at you"

(picture bunny holding a guitar) "I know it's loud. I just don't care" ?!?!?!?!

And my personal favorite:
"I have a dream, and in it something eats you."


And to think, someone is actually making money off of these.
Ahh, the American dream. =)

Ventage

So something has been called to my attention.
I already sensed it as I wrote my blog on Sunday...

I mainly use this blog as a place to vent my frustrations, vent my feelings about life, child-rearing, everything... But I also probably spend too much time whining aobut my full schedule and how I never get to "rest", and not nearly enough time talking about the fullness of my life, and how much I ENJOY my daughter.

Let me put this in no uncertain terms... Having Reese is the most fulfilling, wonderful experience I have ever had the pleasure of enjoying. I love every little thing about that little girl. I love her crazy hair that I cannot fix smoothly to save my life. I love how she sings songs to herself, makes up music on her own, I love watching her do her puzzles, struggling to put each little piece exactly in its place. I love watching her color, concentrating so hard on holding that marker, pressing it so firmly onto the paper that I'm scared she is going to push the marker part out the other end! I love how she "works on her house", tearing her playhouse apart and pounding on it with her plastic hammer. I love how she wants to have books in her bed with her when she goes down for her nap. I love B!! I love that she always wants to wear dresses, and dancing shoes... And I love her so much, that I cry as I write this because any difficult days, any temper tantrums, any days where I have raised my voice at her when maybe I shouldn't have because I was that frustrated, any time where she has flat out ignored everything I am saying and completely disregards me, pale in comparison to the joy that she has brought to my life.

I say this so that when I have a second child, I can reassure myself, that while the "baby days" are difficult, the joys to come and the experience of loving a child and being loved by a child is immeasurable and incomprehensible. It so far surpasses my highest expectations of being a mom.

I had a very difficult first couple months being a mom, and a difficult time during the 7 month old to 9 month old phase, as well. But I can barely even remember that now. It all goes so fast. And the difficult days end - every 24 hours! Because even one day in a child's life changes them it seems. I remember looking at my friend's 2 year olds when Reese was only 1, and thinking, there is NO way Reese will be there in a year!

ALL THIS TO SAY, for all you moms out there having any difficulties, having tough days, days where you need help (!), days where you feel totally alone in this whole thing (despite your husband's best attempts!), days where you feel like your life is completely ripped out of your hands... IT GETS BETTER!! AND BETTER AND BETTER AND BETTER!!! Trust me.

The other day Reese came up to me on the couch, standing next to me while I sat, and she put her arm around my neck, stared smiling at me for a bit, and just leaned over and kissed my head. If that doesn't rock your world, than I don't know what could.

Getting Lola in on the Photo Booth Action

First, just us...




At this point, Lola is not too happy with me...

Not-So-Sleepy Sunday

So, I'm a church-skipper today. Not feeling so great, exhausted from the weekend, and really needing some down-time. However, seeing as I am now resigned to the house due to our one-car household, this also means I am constrained to our home with my preciously high-energy highly-emotional toddler who, as I write, is hollering in frustration over the collapse of her Lego tower. The 5th said Tower we have constructed in the last 10 minutes. SO, down-time is not something I will have the luxury of enjoying.

Here are the things I would like to do this morning:

1. Lay down on the couch for 10 consecutive minutes (or more)
2. Finish my TIME magazine
3. Sit still
4. READ.
5. Not watch Dora, Charlie & Lola, or Go, Diego, Go.
6. Drink coffee; maybe even 2 cups
7. Take a shower by myself
8. Go for a run outside ALONE

Here are the things I will end up doing this morning, and already have done, since 6:30 am when Reese woke up:

1. Lay down for a teasing 3 minutes before hopping up to respond to shrieks of "mommy"
2. Start 3 separate articles in TIME before #1 ensues
3. Sit still not long enough to know how awesome it feels to be sitting.
4. Read Angelina Ballerina, Berenstein Bears, and Miss Mopp's Lucky Day.
5. Watch Charlie & Lola
6. Pour 3 cups of coffee, but only drink 1/4 of each cup before #1 ensues.
7. Will end up taking a shower with Reese either outside the door watching and crying to come in, or with Reese at my feet crying because the soap is getting in her eyes.
8. Running doesn't seem so important anymore.


Okay, let it just be known, that Reesey is just in a phase where Mommy is the only one she will cry to, or lean on, call for right now, which in some ways is sweet, but also pretty exhausting. I love my little girl with all my heart, but I would really love some alone time at the moment. =)

Add to Words I HATE...

flesh.

blech... it's a horrible word!!

Must Share...

So I'm pretty excited because I found some great music lately, as WELL as made a pretty sweet workout playlist.
If you have spent any time around me and my iPod, you know we have a very close relationship. I spend ridiculous amounts of time looking for good music, and even more so, GREAT workout music. I can't even fathom working out without something perfect to listen to; and that is usually my biggest complaint with any workout class. I'm so tired of spinning to classic rock! NOTHING against classic rock, mind you, I'm always up for some Boston or Steve Miller Band, but I just cannot get excited about working out to "Sweet Home Alabama","Jungle Love" or any other Eagles songs anymore! Seriously!!

SO, here's what I would call Playlist of the Year.
If you need to get pumped up for running your marathon commitments, 5Ks, or other various energy expenditures, THIS, I promise you, will do the job. I'm so proud of myself!

So proud, I just might burn you a copy if you ask. =) (and before you get all worked up, know that just because I choose to exercise to the likes of Girlicious or Pussycat Dolls, does not mean I own fishnet hose, wear bustiers or even enjoy kissing girls. it's all for the calories, people!!)

1. Hot N Cold - katy perry
2. So What - pink
3. Like Me - girlicious
4. Disturbia - rihanna
5. Sorry - madonna
6. Forever - chris brown
7. When I Grow Up - pussycat dolls
8. 2 of You - danity kane
9. New Workout Plan - kanye west
10. Piece of Me - britney
11. Move Shake Drop Remix - dj laz
12. Damaged - danity kane
13. Do It Well - jennifer lopez
14. Ooh Ooh Baby - britney
15. Low - flo rida
16. Stronger - kanye west
17. 4 Minutes - madonna
18. Gimme More - britney
19. I Kissed A Girl - katy perry
20. Here I Come - the roots
21. Say This Sooner - the almost
22. Sexy Back - justin timberlake
23. Radar - britney
24. Unconditional - the bravery
25. Viva la Vida - coldplay
26. Mercy - duffy
27. Break the Ice - britney
28. What You Waiting For? - gwen stefani
29. Holiday (Faded Ending) - green day
30. Charlotte - air traffic

Okay, so my list actually goes to 61 songs, but I won't bore you.
Anyways, hope you enjoy!

Oh, and if you haven't already, check out The Weepies.

My Little Princess

Reese and Emma'S playdate.
So cute.

WHEW!!

What a week!!!

Tonight's luau at our complex was the culmination of a week of total exhaustion and accomplishment. It's unreal how one week can bring so much growth, change, emotion... I'm relieved that it's over!! I had a great time at the luau, but I am definitely glad to stop thinking about it, for sure. Next events on the agenda are a birthday party, bridal shower, and ice cream social THIS WEEK. Not to mention, a huge meeting on Friday - Reese's new teacher!! WHOAH. Reese loved Ms. Pam last year, so I'm hoping the attachment wasn't strong enough to keep her from enjoying her new teacher. I'm sure she's adaptable. =) But I'm really excited. Mostly I'm excited to meet the person who will begin teaching her as of NEXT TUESDAY!! I love love love love love the company of my daughter. But I also love pre-school. =) I love that she gets to have the interaction with the other kids, that she has the structure that I'm not that great at giving her, as much as I try, and I love how much thought and time and energy goes into the program she is enrolled in. They truly try to help parents feel they are not missing out on their children even in those mere 10 hours they are away from us. I CAN'T WAIT! I know she will love it.

This week also brought a Cowboys pre-season game with my sweet friend Sarah, "Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants" with Jackie and Stace, and a life-saving playdate for Reese and Emma! There was a lot going on.

Friday... wow. Are you kidding?! Friday was out of control. I have not had a day that long in such a long time!! Since we had to get ready for the luau, Friday was the day I had set aside for a lot of planning, purchasing, visualizing, etc. Of course, I didn't really take into consideration that I ALSO had timesheets due, expense reports due, the monthly prayer morning!!, A DENTAL APPOINTMENT IN DALLAS, AND A STAFF LUNCH, not to mention everyday work!!! ARE YOU KIDDING?!!?!?!
So, my day was packed, and by the time it was 5, I finally sat down for about 30 minutes before Reese woke up from her nap (oh yeah, did I mention I had her with me during ALL of this - including dental appointment!). And, okay, noooo I did not pray all morning like my schedule had called for. I did however, pray in my car as I was running errands. And I really mean that. =) I had a lot to pray about!!

So, by the time evening rolled around, I did some grocery shopping, somewhat in a fog of disorientation and exhaustion, and went home to bake 4 boxes of brownies for the luau.

TODAY... Holy cow. Today. Luau extraordinaire!! Party was successful, and I'm sure Niles will post pictures on his blog. It was such a great time, and the setup was awesome, the food was awesome, the people are ALWAYS awesome, and overall, I am beyond thrilled. We got a water volleyball net (and ball), a DJ, a pig which had been roasting since 4 am... So many people came out and I actually think they are still out there.

I'm soooo tired because as soon as it was all over, we still had to take everything down, take all the dishes up, and CLEAN them all. blah. It's 12:45, and I'm still up, basically because this is the first time I have been able to sit by myself, and just... yeah. It seems so rare now that I get these moments, and I can tell that even though I wish I had more of them, I am right in my element, doing what I am doing. Because I feel energized, I am excited, and I am already looking forward to the next party! I absolutely love my residents so much, and I feel so blessed and happy being where we are. I absolutely feel that God has placed us here for a reason, and I don't doubt it for a second. I forget that we have only been here for only 2 months!

Thank God for purpose and change and relationships.

Lately...

Lord is life ever busy right now. Maybe that's why I physically feel sad when The Hills is over. But seriously, life is full of wonderful things right now, but I have to say, I would love to feel like I actually have time to do anything relaxing, rejuvenating, refreshing...

I really just want an hour by myself to sit, read, not think, not plan, not check emails or answer my phone, and escape.

Let me be clear that I am totally thrilled with my job, my opportunities... even the busy-ness is great and right up my alley. But I also know it gets really easy to slip into survival mode, neglect relationships or family time, and let the obligations overtake the joys. I am determined to ensure that my family gets what they need from me, as well as ensure that I get what I need from life. And most of that means allowing God to really fill me up when I get empty... really allow Him to fire me up when I burn out... and listen when I hear the prompting of His voice to slow down, stop talking, and mostly stop worrying!!! Everyday I have to remind myself that God only gives us the grace to deal with today, because He specifically tells us not to stress over tomorrow because it will take care of itself.

Right now I find myself giving out sooo much, and expending so much that it's not till later that I realize I am exhausted or that I can really take in the experience that has already past.

Well, I know that I am walking in God's purpose for my life. I know that Niles and I together are on the path God has set before us, and we will continue that way, knowing that at times we will fail, we will screw up, and at times we will actually accomplish things, and make progress, and be successful! The objective is to make sure that God takes pleasure in our lives and is blessed by what we do. And right now I will have to realize that sometimes that means stepping back, maybe stepping out, not being in control of every situation, knowing I can't fix everything, everyone. Realizing that I may disappoint people because I finally take care of myself instead of them... And I will totally be uncomfortable!!

I'm guarding my heart, letting God direct my steps, my words, trusting Him to go before me and make a way for me as He always has. Trusting that He will answer my prayers and hear what's in my heart... And I know He does. Time and again He has shown that my prayers do not fall on deaf ears, and why I ever doubt, I do not know.

Some more pictures!

Me and Jessica at the Legacy Ball her church held.


And with our mommas


That was an amazing night!
I love ya Jess and I'm so glad you invited me to come. I will expect an invitation to the head table at each and every one.
=)

What I think about the Hills.

Okay, since you asked...

Loved it. Loved the premiere and for whatever reason, thirty minutes just does not seem long enough for this gem.
I know, I know, It is the obsession of no-life, too-much-time, teeny boppers... I just cannot get enough!!

Here are the reasons I should not love The Hills:
1. I'm 30.
2. I can never have hair like that.
3. I'm 30.
4. I will never have clothes like that.
5. I'm 30.
6. I am a mother, and those girls should scare any parent of a girl.
7. Lauren has nothing to say on any date she ever goes on. Really nothing interesting to say... ever.
8. Heidi absolutely reminds me of my stupidity in past relationships and noone wants to remember that stuff!
9. Spencer.
10. I'm THIRTY.

But I can't stop it... It is an unstoppable force!! It is the proverbial train wreck that must be watched over and over!
So, since it will not and cannot be contained, I must comment.

I love Audrina. She has made some dumb decisions (justin bobby) but she seems like a good friend, maybe a little naive, but pretty level-headed. I think Lo was completely and totally out of line with her little attitude in the final conversation and it was so infuriating to watch! But, this will make this season that much more interesting.

Why is is that Lauren seems like she never says anything interesting... at all?! ESPECIALLY on dates?! I don't get the fascination. I don't. She is beautiful, she is well-dressed and fashionable, she has great hair... and she seems like a good friend, albeit a little Type-A, but why are we interested?!?!

Whitney - flawless.
Spencer - I mean, seriously!!??1 Is he for real?! Does he know the level of disgust people feel towards him? Is he content in his soul with that?! Oy. The boy needs to be sent... away, or... something. Just banish him!

I Love American Swimmers!

Geez, Louise.
Are all our American swimmers required to be great-looking?! (the boys anyway)

I'm such a nerd. I just watched some of my DVRed Olympics and saw a few swimmers get gold medals... I freaking cry every dang time I hear the American anthem.

I taught Reese to say "Go America!" every time she watches the swim meets.

Sliding

Such a Girly Girl

Quiz

I feel loved when...

The Five Love Languages

My Primary Love Language is Acts of Service

My Detailed Results:
Acts of Service:	10
Quality Time:	8
Words of Affirmation:	7
Receiving Gifts:	3
Physical Touch:	2

About this quiz

Unhappiness in relationships is often due to the fact that we speak different love languages. It can be helpful to know what language you speak and what language those around you speak.

Tag 3 people so they can find out what their love language is.

Take the Quiz!
Check out the Book

Grrrr

I'm having a rough day.
=(

FINALLY. Some pictures!!!

Okay, so after all your ranting about my non-posting, you get like 5 posts in a few days, AND, PICTURES! What the heck?!?! No, I still cannot find my camera cord, so these are all from Niles' phone. Luckily, he has an overpriced, fancy schmancy phone that takes magnificent photos.

So, to catch up...
These first two are from the FC Dallas game. The glorious, hot, hot, smoldering hot day watching David Beckham. (I love you Niles.)




We've learned recently that the way to get Reese to smile, is not to say "cheese", but to say "B". B is her blankie, B is her muse, B is everywhere. B is us, and we are nothing without B. I should probably spell it Bea, since we refer to "her" as a person. "Bea is taking a bath". "Bea is so tired, she needed to stay home - mommy did not forget her." "Bea, for cryin out loud, would you please stop slathering yourself in tomato sauce and dirt!"

These last two are of the kitten that many of you have yet to meet. The kitten who has started to make me realize why I've always preferred dogs. This cat goes by many names. A few of our favorites: "Nighttime Eye Gouger"; "Leaping Way Too High at My Face"; "Claws Too Long"; "Freak Out Furball"; "Where the Hell Did You Come From, Stabbing At Me Like That".
But, oh she is cute.


This is when Reese watercolor painted her back.