Monkeys, Trees, and all these things...

V Day 2011

2011-02-14T15:15:00.000-07:00

I guess I really am one of those people who just doesn't get into Valentine's Day!

I completely forgot about it all weekend long, and then this morning was woken up by a beautiful, MASSIVE bouquet of roses from Niles! I am really in shock and can't believe he got up so early and ran out to grab them! He also got Reese a really cute pink and red turtle. I guess Cameron just has to get used to V-Day being about the girls. Although... I suppose that was where I did an epic "mommy fail" because I totally didn't do anything for either of my children for Valentine's!! Welp. There's always next year!!

I may try to cook something... That's a gift around here.

Realistically, what I would LOVE to be doing right now, is driving out to Borders. Because my new BFF in cyberspace and fake reality, is the Pioneer Woman and I LOVE and ADORE her, and she is literally 40 miles away from me, RIGHT NOW!!!
I would really, really, really like to be in the car with my children right now to obtain a signature and photo. =)
BUT, alas, it s Monday. A workday. For me and my husband. I also have two children, one that requires two naps a day, one of which would be right now, as we speak... the same "right now" in which I should be standing in line at Borders to meet my BFF.

Fingers crossed... maybe we'll head out after naptime, and just maybe the line will be dwindling, and just maybe she will stay until the store closes because I imagine she is that kind of awesome friend. =)

Stay tuned!!!

Ahh, A Successful Day of Parenting...

2011-02-12T21:57:00.000-07:00

So I usually think of myself as a pretty good parent. I love and adore my kids with a fiery passion and even with my full-time job, still feel like I make a massive effort to put my parenting as a major priority - structuring my day around how I can get them out of doors to play, how I can work in a playdate with friends, trying as much as I can to limit the TV-babysitting to as much of a minimum as I can at all times (which I fail at quite a bit, but which I also really, really try to do!!!).

Today was a beautiful day of spending an amazing amount of time really, really playing and enjoying my babies. Lately, as Reese is speeding towards the terrifying time where I have to send her to kindergarten at public school, (a system of which I have never personally had any sort of issue with until faced with the reality of sending my precious baby there... now I feel like I'm losing her to "the world" - judge me if you must. But I spent each and every year and school day of my life in a school where we prayed, read our Bibles, learned Bible stories and talked about Jesus... EVERY DAY. Openly. In public and without any opposition or "tolerance" issues) I realize how sweet, special, and priveleged I feel that my sweet little girl really, actually wants nothing more than my unbridled affection, attention, company and love. A few hours of playing Barbies and coloring when what I really want to do is read Pioneer Woman's story of her romance to Marlboro Man and his chaps, has now started to hold new meaning for me. And in actuality, playing with Barbies actually goes by remarkably fast, and truthfully, I don't have to create any imaginary scenarios because Reese really just tells me exactly how the whole thing will go. I basically just have to repeat after her. =)

So today we started off, as we do almost every Saturday, with daddy's pancake breakfast, cheesy eggs and sausage! Niles has become sort of a pancake aficionado. He tries to get creative - red velvet pancakes, pumpkin pancakes, strawberry/banana pancakes, chocolate, etc - but really, Reese and I get most excited over the basic chocolate chip (butterscotch chips for me!) variety, much to his Food Network-loving chagrin. Today was basic chocolate. Reese had a minor fit, as there were no additional chocolate chips... but we moved past it. She ate and then immediately resigned herself to the couch for a round of Barbie. Since this week was Reese's big old 5th birthday bash, we were kindly bestowed about 10 new Barbies, along with a Barbie pool, Barbie equestrian set complete with horse, Barbie "glam purse" complete with a mock iPhone with fake apps, and several other Barbie sets I can't even remember. Our big focus today was on the Barbie/horse combo. She also got a few My Little Ponies. So, as most horses do, her large Barbie horse laid eggs, which hatched little My Little Pony babies. Interesting... But I digress...

I totally played Barbie/horse for at least a good 45 minutes or so I believe, before we moved onto some reading of her new books she also received this week, and then after Niles left, we did science experiments!! One of her classmates gave her a science kit for her birthday, and we put it to good use. It was actually really fun!! We made "lava", and combined different sets of citric acid and baking soda along with colored tablets, etc. while playing Taylor Swift radio on Pandora all morning! I can honestly say that I enjoyed every moment of play time with my precious girl.

We had a great morning completely absent of all television, so I took the kiddos to the library and let Reese pick out like 10 movies, tons of books and she played on the computer forever while I ran after my son who was adamant on climbing onto every chair available, pounding on every vacant keyboard, pushing his stroller aimlessly into walls, cabinets and tables, screaming (really cutely) every time I removed him, and raced as quickly as possible away from me as soon as he saw me coming. Oh wow. He's adorable. Seriously though, he was exhausting me. Completely. But when I try to get upset with him, he stops, looks at me with the cutest most mischievous little look and I melt into a little puddle which I'm sure he would promptly jump in the middle of if he weren't taking off running in the opposite direction.

After the library, Cam took a great nap, and Reese and I did her schoolwork, read books, and jumped on the trampoline until dinner time.

I sincerely, most genuinely, fully and completely am in love with my children. I cannot even imagine my life without those two little beautiful babies.

Cannot.

And thanks to the HEAVENS, will never have to.

My. Kids. Are. Awesome.

Jealous?!?! =))

Christmas Eve

2010-12-29T21:01:00.001-07:00

When Niles and I got married in October 2002, I honestly believe our first major fight (as newlyweds, that is) happened on Christmas Eve of that same year. You see, in Niles' family, there is a calm exchanging of gifts after a nice dinner at the local Olive Garden. The participants are his parents, his brother, his sister, and himself. They go out for dinner (a tradition I found altogether weird and yet, once I started engaging, found really nice and relaxing - no cleanup or setting of tables) to the OG, then return home where they each get 1 or 2 gifts each. Then they may stay up, watch a movie, play with their new gifts (b/c even now the boys actually get things they can PLAY with - our first year it was remote control jeeps and foam swords, last year it was Nerf guns... ahh boys), snack on Christmas food from neighbors and students from the University, and then go to bed.

Calm. Laid back. Fun, but also not too loud considering there are only 5 or 6 people involved, now that I'm in the picture.

Not so in my family.

Christmas Eve in my family means there are my dad's two sisters and husbands, their four children, two spouses of those children, and five grandchildren. Then of course, my mom, my two brothers, my sister-in-law and our kids as well. Usually someone involves at least one dog as well... It is not calm, it is not laid back, it IS fun, but it is definitely LOUD. Like, LOUD. Lots of chanting ("presents, presents"... and then when it's someone's turn, "Lindsay, Lindsay..." and such. But we also make other variations of the chanting. Sometimes there may be some banging involved, sometimes a little "under-chant" of the person's middle or last name... maybe a nickname. Usually clapping, and sometimes we've been known to do the "wave" as well. The wave one does at a baseball game with a full stadium - not the wave one does with their hands), dancing, decorative bows being placed on heads, bodies, babies and children, etc. We usually potluck the meal and scatter all over the house to eat without a lot of etiquette or placing of silverware or napkin rings. We do always read the Christmas story, I mean, we are Christians after all... The presents usually involve something passed down from my grandparents who are no longer alive, a gift that my aunt found at Sam Moon or from a street vendor on a local trip, and then usually some Starbucks gift cards. Seriously, it's really a crazy night of fun, noise, laughs and general hysteria. In other words, awesomeness. This is what I'm used to.

When Niles and I got married and he came to his first Christmas Eve with my family, I thought he might curl up in the fetal position under the tree and cry tears of fear. He was so completely overwhelmed and exhausted within the first 10 minutes of it all. And if you know my husband, you should understand that the words "loud", "hysterical", "fun", and "exhausting" are not foreign to him. They are, in fact, part of his general make-up. Ironically, though, he is exhausted by the collective force of my family's ability to celebrate in high gear. We fought, not because he did anything wrong, or I did anything wrong, but because I could not understand why he was not enjoying and participating in the madness. I was so hurt and offended by his lack of comprehension and ability to celebrate up to Cole par, that I told him he was ruining Christmas for me. HA!! Oh, the newlywed days. =)) We really should have discussed holiday traditions in our pre-marital counseling. We may have waited another year. =)

But seriously. Nowadays, I know not to get offended when Niles disappears at various points of the evening to sit in some quiet corner (bathroom, closet, 7-11 down the road...). I know just to carry on as I normally would with my loud, crazy family members, and eventually Niles will rejoin the party, rejuvenated, and perhaps even ready to participate. Although, I don't hold my breath. =)

Without further ado, and before I write another post about Christmas Day and the general vacation time I've enjoyed... Here's Christmas Eve 2010.

Reese getting hot rolled for the first time. Of course, it's totally dramatic and she looks like Mommie Dearest without the face mask, martini or wire hangers... =)

Banging

Reese's cousins, Coco and Portia

The girls getting ready to lead us in a round of "Twelve Days of Christmas". They assigned us all 'parts' =)

Coco, Portia and Kiana

Three French Hens!

I'm quite obviously a Partridge in a Pear Tree.

Bryce and mom are also partridges.

Reese is a Lady dancing. She played her part beautifully.

Drummer/Pastor Drumming. There might as well have been ten.

FIVE GOLDEN RINGS. LOUD ONES.

My beautiful boy with his gammy!

Count on Reese to get comfortable right in the middle of everything. =))

Wa ha Ah say Ah say Ah say...

Add caption

This is a pretty good image of the chaos that ensues when we try to figure out how we will start the round of present-passing-out.

Best way I can think of to end this post. He's pretty spectacular.

My Church. =)

2010-09-19T08:54:00.002-06:00

So I'm missing church this morning because Cam is getting his first tooth, and is feeling pretty crappy - whether it's because of the tooth or allergies, or whatever, this poor boy is red, watery, snotty and teary. It's so sad. So I'm keeping him home just in case.

But I'm so glad I did. I have needed some really good, maximized alone time with the Lord. And it seems so difficult to find these days with work, children, no sleep, church activities, and just LIFE responsibilities. I have been so tired, so overwhelmed by emotions (probably because of being tired!), and just completely drained, that I have been absolutely no fun to be around. I'm always whiny, overemotional and sensitive, and pretty much intolerable probably. To be at home this morning has been a tremendous blessing in disguise. Even though I've been taking care of my boy, I've had time to play my worship music loud and uninterrupted; read one of my devotionals during his bath time, while sitting in the presence of God listening to Eddie James sing about the name of the Lord. It has been one of the most refreshing times I've experienced in quite a few weeks.

What I've learned over these past few weeks is that not only can I not survive without the presence of my Father, I cannot function without His peace, victory, and hope. The knowledge of the victory and authority I have over my emotions and my personal frustrations/concerns/issues that I have been reminded of this morning, is utterly indescribable for me right now. I have sat on some things for a while, praying casually but sincerely, that the Lord would help me submit them to Him; but I have not paused to really sit in His presence and reflect on His Word for me, reflect on His nature, His love for me, and I have especially not paused to thank Him and bring worship to Him for what He has already done for me.

But this morning I have had that time.. And here's what God immediately showed me through one of my many, many bedside table books. =)
"You are more than a conqueror!"
Romans 8:17 - Yet amid all these things we are more than conquerors and gain a surpassing victory through Him who loved us.
This is not a new verse to me, but because the Word of the Lord IS actually inspired, living and active, it has ramshackled my spirit this morning!! IT's like, I just forgot about His SURPASSING VICTORY!!! How?!?! How does one forget that they are given a surpassing and everlasting victory over their life circumstances and their insecurities and pains?!?!? Because I've been too busy for Him to sit and remember. I've been too busy to rest in Him, abide in Him and find peace in Him. Totally unacceptable!! And I've paid the price for it. (So has Niles ;)

Here's more...
"True victory for the child of God comes when there is still peace in the soul right in the midst of the raging storm - when tragedy strikes and one can still say, "it is well with my soul." This can only happen when you are looking at Jesus instead of your circumstances."
DUH!! I know this. But how easily, quickly I've been shaken... How simple it has been for the world to take that confidence and peace from me because I've felt like everything I've been doing has been too important to let go of in order to give the Lord His time with me.

"The key to having victory is understanding it only comes 'through Him who loved us.' If you are facing problems that seem insurmountable, remember you are a conqueror through Him. Allow God to strengthen your inner man. When you are strong inside you can defeat anything that comes against you."

BIG SIGH.
Thank. You. God.

Mind of Monkey, ed 2

2010-05-23T12:21:00.001-06:00

Sometimes words just can't explain...

The Mind of Monkey...

2010-05-14T15:16:00.004-06:00

So, Reese is always giving me fodder for blog-talk, but I'm horrible at actually blogging it! Well, no more!
Welcome to the Mind of Monkey... Edition 1.

Sunday morning, Reese and I decided to treat me to a Mother's Day sleep-in/church-skip.
Niles came in to say good-bye and asked us if we liked the shirt he was wearing... Reese promptly replied, "No. Dad, you need to change." As we both started laughing, she looked at us stone-faced, and said, "Daddy. I'm not joking."
When it comes to fashion, girlfriend is not playin' around.

Sunday afternoon (Mother's Day), Reese was racing through the house, running as she always does to some unknown emergency, and she tripped and ate it on the floor. She was bawling her eyes out, and through her heartwrenching tears, said to me (equally heartwrenching), "Mommy, I fell... on Mother's Day!!!"

And
Scene.

Life is good. It's good I tell ya

2010-03-21T10:32:00.002-06:00

So, in the interest of updating this blog, if only to make the first thing you see something non-Twilight-related, I will go ahead and write about actual life happenings in the Holsinger home! =)

It is busy.

It is very, very, let me say it, crazy busy.

Reese, my beautiful, charming, funny toddler is now a "big girl" at age 4. She is practically a teenager in her mind's eye. Sometimes I find this extremely unnerving, especially after a recent conversation I had with an actual teenager. If you know me and we have had a conversation about my children, you know that the years from 12 to 18 are especially terrifying to me. I literally have visions of horrifying parties, raves, Reese waving glow sticks, sneaking out her window and wearing mini-jeanskirts with ripped up fishnet stockings that she pulled out of her backpack after leaving my home in a plaid jumper over a turtleneck. I can't even tell you the atrocities that start to form in my head. But I refuse to be the "cool mom" who lets my kids drink underage b/c "at least they're in my home"... and all that business (channeling Amy Poehler in Mean Girls). However, I'm dying to learn the secrets of those parents who raised their children to be open and honest with them, meanwhile keeping a safe distance from their social lives so as not to embarrass them, etc. Does this mean I have to stop yelling at the kids who are mean on the playground?! I don't know... I actually find a lot of satisfaction in disciplining those kids at Central Market - that's where they usually hang out.
Okay, so anyways... back to reality.

Reese remains funny, charming and beautiful, and I absolutely love and adore her. She is quite emotional/sensitive these days and has a hard time with listening, which is to be expected for a 4 year old. But I do think this personality has something to do with the craziness of our busy lives, and the decrease in attention I can give her between my job and the new baby. She had me to herself for almost 4 years, and we literally did EVERYTHING together up until 5 months ago. So, clearly, she has had some major transition to get used to. Bless her heart. I'm making a concerted effort to take her with me for a couple hours at a time to do things, and hopefully the more often we can do this together, the more normal she will start to feel again.

CAMERON, the most precious, handsome little man, with a smile that completely melts your heart, a laugh that reduces me to a puddle on the floor, and eyes that are just out of this world... What can I say?!!? He is just remarkable. I adore that little boy and am over the moon in love with him!! I just want to put him in my pocket so I can have him with me all the time. He has brought so much joy to our family and it truly shows me that when it comes to kids, your heart truly stretches and the love you never thought you could possibly share for another child, just kind of rocks your world. Cam slept in our bed with us for 3 months, half because I was nursing and just needed SLEEP, and half because I just fell in love with my little cuddle-buddy and didn't want to move him. haha... He is totally a light sleeper, so our biggest issue with him has mostly been sleep-scheduling and just a total lack of consistency. He does his own thing, albeit, with a beautiful smile on his face so I can't get too upset with him! He is constantly moving, kicking, standing, flailing... He watches his big sister like a hawk and is so ready to do everything she does! He laughs at her all the time and she is always talking to him and trying to make him laugh. They are absolutely hilarious together.

Me and Niles find ourselves with nary a night to relax or lay low, as responsibilities at church and work and home continue to grow. God has us in a really unique and fabulous time in our lives, but it definitely has its new and exciting challenges! Scheduling our lives on a day-to-day basis has become a necessity, and to plan anything fun or friend-wise is either a totally spontaneous in-the-moment decision, or planned a month out! I love to be busy, but a vacation would certainly be welcome right now. Or realistically, 3 nights of uninterrupted sleep would do, too. Under-eye concealer is my new best friend. But as life and schedules have become so busy, God's grace and presence have become more real than ever before! It's probably because daily, I have had to lean on Him and trust Him with each concern, each and every issue of frustration or worry... I have experienced His movement in my spirit and heart like never before and am literally finding joy and peace beyond comprehension through simply knowing I am His child and He is my King, my Counselor, my friend and above all, my SAVIOUR!! It excites me to feel such a growing desire for Him, and for relationship with Him. I know it means that I'm walking in truth and in step with Jesus and knowing that allows me to lean on Him even more, and trust Him even more with the issues of my heart.

So, essentially, this is an overview of life as WE know it.

And, as I write this, I AM watching "New Moon" which Niles went out at midnight to buy for me on Friday. Don't you dare judge me. I'm fully going to go read Henri Nouwen and maybe watch a little March Madness this afternoon. I'm cool okay!!
And, if I feel like it, I just might make up a dance routine to "Party in the U.S.A." after all that!

Okay, duh, I already know I'm a ridiculous 30 year old teenager...

2009-11-21T19:20:00.004-07:00

So yes, after thousands of weeks of counting down to New Moon via my New Moon Countdown App (thank you all-knowing, all-resourceful, all-powerful iPhone!), Thursday night brought the highly-anticipated evening of my 2009 thus far. (Oh yes, besides the birth of my son... haha.. which I will clearly blog about in the near future - too much to catch up on, I have to start small)

Me and some of my fellow die-hard (or Twi-hard if you will...) Twilight friends caught a lucky break thanks to Awesome Jackie, and went on Thursday evening at 6 pm... A full 6 hours before it was really released to the public. We all spent one night at my house decorating T-shirts and watching the first Twilight which was a blast. Here's the rundown of our artistic expressions:
"They call me Spider Monkey" - me
"I'd rather be in Forks" - Jackie
"Edward prefers brunettes" - Julie
"Edward... 'nuf said" - April
"Team McSparkle" - Rebekah
"How long have you been 17" - Virginia

So, Thursday we met exceptionally early to head out to the theater and waited from 4 until 6 in line, FIRST in line I might add. By the time they pulled back the rope to let us down the hall to the theater, we literally took off running down the hallway. We didn't even look back. As we got some awesome seats in the theater, we then proceeded to engage in fits of screaming, hand-grabbing, and yes, even spirit fingers!!! It was such a rush of excitement to finally be in the theater!!! We sat through what felt like endless amounts of unnecessary previews for movies we cared less about, before... finally... the Summit logo crossed the screen and it was TIME!!!

New Moon nearly met all my expectations, and absolutely raised the bar from the sub-par, albeit still much-loved, Twilight. There are, as I would think any avid Twilight lover has to admit, some things that were definitely lacking in the movie, but I don't know that any movie can ever truly satisfy your readers' expectations. They are just too great and fantastic to be translated. However, I am so happy with the final and overall product that is New Moon!!! In fact, so happy that I'm going to see it again tomorrow night, which will be followed with many more viewings I'm sure.

I do obviously wish there had been more Edward, but that was to be expected. Kristen Stewart was such a better Bella this time around and so much more likable. Jacob was so great that I nearly could have switched "teams". Nearly - but not quite. =) I do wish Edward would not have gotten his butt kicked in the Volturi fight scene... That was really frustrating. Especially since he can READ MINDS and therefore ANTICIPATE ALL FIGHTING MOVES!?!?!??! So, seriously, that was a problem. Also, from the point Alice shows up and the Italy trip ensues, the movie moves way too quick for my liking. There was sooo much for Edward and Bella to discuss after they got back together and there was none of that in the film, which I'm not happy about... But like I said, OVERALL, sooo wonderful and fabulous and lovely. I can't wait to see it again!!!

TEFL!!

(team edward for life, duh)

Do you even KNOW?!

2009-03-20T17:35:00.002-06:00

Do all of you even know what is happening tonight?!

TWILIGHT is out on DVD!!
Midnight.
Midnight, people.

Let the hysteria begin!!!
Can't wait to have a watching party!!

Pregnant

2009-02-19T19:28:00.002-07:00

Yup. That's me!

We found out two weeks ago today, so February 5th...
I took EIGHT tests this month for various reasons. I think obviously I knew something was different this month, but the first four tests all came back negative. Of course, I did buy two of them at the Dollar Store and two of them on clearance at Tom Thumb. But I figured, a test's a test, right?! Well, apparently the days between tests 4 and 5 clearly were a landmark moment. =)

My first REAL clue was a few Sundays ago. I was on my way home from church and ALL I WANTED WAS TACO BUENO NACHOS! Like, more than anything on the planet and I wanted them YESTERDAY. So... weird. I actually took my 4th cheap test that day, and it came out negative.
The next day, same thing. Taco Bueno nachos on the brain. I was obsessed. So I literally ate Bueno nachos for 3 days straight! I mean, they're good, but really?! for 3 days?!
Each day I felt weirdly nauseated, which is very unlike me, as I do not have a weak stomach and I rarely get sick to my stomach.
So Thursday, on my way to staff meeting, I could immediately tell that if I did not EAT right then, I was going to be completely sick!! I walked in and said this, and my friend Katherine looked at me and said, "Are you pregnant?!" She, being pregnant, feels like this very often. So, that was a major red flag.

I bought the first digital test that day, and sure enough, PREGNANT!

Niles and I have actually been planning for this sweet baby for several months, and I was right at the point where I felt like maybe this was going to be a long road. Thank God that His timing is the best for us and that only He knows His plans and His plans are best! I'm so excited about this journey and about adding this new little blessing to our family!!

We went to the doctor yesterday, and against my hopes of being almost 9 weeks, we found that we are only 6. =( Oh well. I really love the "bigness" of being pregnant and that whole experience, so I was hoping it was happening sooner rather than later. But, it's okay. If we base this experience on the last, I should be showing in about 3 weeks. =)

Due date for now? October 16!! Three days before our 7th anniversary!!

SO exciting!!

Submission.

2009-02-15T17:58:00.002-07:00

Since I finally decided to give in and do my 25 things on Facebook, I figured I could at least put all that effort to good use and double up on my bloggage for the day.

Rules: Once you've been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 25 random things, facts, habits, or goals about you. At the end, choose 25 people to be tagged. You have to tag the person who tagged you. If I tagged you, it's because I want to know more about you.

1. I love anything involving making some type of list. Hence my submission to the 25 things craze...

2. I love hearing the sounds of my daughter singing and playing in her room absentmindedly... She makes up her own songs.

3. I.HATE.TALKING.ON.THE.PHONE.

4. I'm completely in love with Twilight, and you probably are too.

5. I spent an entire day of my life in a movie theater when you count up all the times I saw Titanic.

6. I could spend days on end reading and be completely content. I could spend days on end just reading Twilight and be totally content. As long as I have at least 10 books on my bookstand, I can be content. I'm a book junkie.

7. I eat Sour Patch Watermelons at least once a week

8. I love going dancing!! LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE IT. Except country dancing.

9. I could really go for having 4 kids. I love being pregnant, and I LOVE my little girl.

10. We have a demon cat named Lola, who I'm starting to love, because she's actually only nice to me.

11. I take a bath almost every night, so I can finally get some reading time in before I go to bed. And it just seems easier to wash my face that way...

12. I despise having to go to sleep and end my day. No matter how tired I am!

13. I get extremely ansty and cabin-fevered if I stay home for too long - which usually ends up in me going to Target and buying something.

14. Barnes and Noble is one of my favorite places to go. And I could stay there for hours. Oh and Half-Price books too, but B&N is much more cozy.

15. I really want to do a whole trip through Europe; backpack, hostels, trains, whatever... I'm not scared! I just want to see it all. I especially want to go to Italy, Greece, and Turkey.

16. I could very easily eat pizza with extra cheese and/or cheese fries with ranch EVERY SINGLE DAY. A meal without cheese just does not count.

17. I love jigsaw puzzles, but I have to do them few and far between, because it literally takes over my life until I finish. Not to mention that it takes over our entire table, and makes Niles none too thrilled.

18. I love music. I have to have music with everything I do. Can't work out without it, can't have a get-together without it, need it when I walk in the door. I will make a playlist for everything and I LOVE burning CDs for people!!

19. I really do enjoy cooking, but it seems rare lately that I ever get creative. When Niles and I lived in Florida, I pulled out my cookbooks every Sunday, picked out an entire meal plan for the week, and made a new dinner every single night.

20. I only let Reese watch shows that I enjoy having on in the background. Excluding Dora.

21. I waited tables for 3 years at Rockfish, and nearly 2 total years at two different Chilis. I actually really loved waiting tables!!

22. I LOVE my job, love the people I work with and LOVE going to meetings!!

23. I love Christmas and everything about it. This year was the first time in a long time that I didn't send out Christmas cards by Thanksgiving and didn't have my tree up by mid-November! It was so sad!

24. I love working out, being busy, having a lot of things on my plate. Otherwise I feel completely unmotivated and useless.

25. I have still not gotten my degree... I have only 7 classes left!!

Marathon Pics

2009-01-23T08:31:00.003-07:00

Here you go... Finally, White Rock Marathon pictures.
Remember, I just ran 13.1 miles, so I look a bit crusty. (I hate that word, but I think it's the most fitting)

The Starting Line at Victory Plaza or Park or whatever it's called.

Me with the white sweatshirt tied around my waist, running at Mile 11

My two friends Virginia and Erin came down to cheer me on at the 11 mile marker, and it was the PERFECT timing! I was in PAIN, and I was so encouraged to see some familiar faces in the crowd.

This is after the race, with some of our team, Tina and her husband did the race together, and Jackie helped coordinate all the racers... She was supposed to run... long story. =) haha

I know I have to do another one of these at some point in time, but until then, these will suffice to make me proud for a while. =)

working my way out...

2009-01-03T23:34:00.002-07:00

...of the TV addiction that is.
And, I honestly have to give a little 'what-what' to Stephenie Meyer and her highly addictive crack cocaine, a.k.a. Twilight, for seriously getting me off of TV for a record 10 days in order to fall back in love with reading.
Okay, that's a little dramatic... I am always in love with reading, BUT, with CARES business, work, toddler, husband, new church, oh yes, and my other work, reading kind of took a back seat for a while. I'd say I read pretty steadily the entire year until July when our whole world seemed to change in about 10 seconds. SO, in November when I really picked up Twilight and was sucked into a black hole of awesometown (yes, I think I'm rapidly turning into "Comic Book Guy" from the Simpsons...), I remembered just how wonderful it is to lose yourself in a book... or any hobby I suppose that doesn't involve a lot of "No, stop doing that" or "Hola! I'm Dora!".

So, I have set some pretty strict restrictions on myself for 09 as far as entertainment goes.
I really am going to try to limit myself to following only a handful of shows:
24, Lost, Fringe, Office, Gossip Girl (duh) and maybe Grey's. This is a big deal, people!! But, I am determined to work on my brain, soul, and body this year, and I don't think TV can really assist me towards that end. I'm sure we could sit and debate that, and I'm not going to be anal about this; I'm sure I will cheat. BUT, the goal is to read more, educate more, work out more, look out for my health a bit more (w/o veggies of course) and spend as much time cultivating my relationships with family and friends as possible.

Here are a few of the tangible goals for the year:
1. Another Half-marathon - probably the Austin Half, or the Big D in April
2. FULL Marathon - White Rock or something earlier in the year, not sure yet
3. BOOT CAMP - starting next month!
4. Set a reading list and actually finish each and every book (working on compiling that at the moment... feel free to offer suggestions!!)
5. VOLUNTEER in some way or another. I am going to get our apartment community to help out once a month at Genesis Women's Shelter in some form, as we adopted a family for the holidays, and it was such a great experience purchasing and collecting all the items on their wish list. Niles, Reese and I took them to the dropoff, along with $175 in gift cards for the family!! It makes me cry every time I think about it.
6. Find some way to do something for the troops. (Niles is making fun of me, but we watched Lions for Lambs tonight, and I'm all inspired to do something important and encouraging. Currently doing research, but again, all suggestions are welcome!)
7. GO TO SOME CONCERTS. My friend Sarah and I have talking about this for some time as we have similar music tastes. This is something I always think about, but just get caught up in the rut of Grapevine, Chilis and Sonic (sigh) and forget all about it. But I truly love music and I hate that there is sooo much out there I don't know about. =(

Okay, so, it's almost 1:00 am, and considering I just got over being grossly ill, I should head to bed.

peace out.

Me and Edward Cullen

2009-01-01T18:31:00.002-07:00

He's sooo dreamy. =)

Books I Read in 2008

2009-01-01T13:22:00.004-07:00

A Girls Guide to Hunting and Fishing - Melissa Bank (you know... i may have read this last year...)
Eat Pray Love - Elizabeth Bilbert
The Last Lecture - Jerry Pausch (FAN FREAKING TASTIC)
Stori Telling - yes, i believe you know her...
A Thousand Splendid Suns - Khalid Hussein
Chris Farley Show - colaboration (this was actually a great read, but very very sad)
Freedom From Fear - Neil Anderson & Rich Miller
Twilight - Stephenie Meyer
New Moon - Stephenie Meyer
Eclipse - Stephenie Meyer
Breaking Dawn - Stephenie Meyer
Skinny Bitch
Marilyn Monroe - Barbara Leaming
Midnight Sun - Stephenie Meyer

Books I got halfway through, which is tragic, but I just was not interested. Seriously.
The Shack - ugh, i don't remember
Marley & Me - John Grogan (I always want to say Josh Groban)
Atonement - Ian McEwan (I still may try to suffer through this one... but I just can't care enough about it)

Goodbye 08! Thank GOD.

2008-12-31T13:59:00.002-07:00

So, we are saying Good Bye to '08...
Let me rephrase, Good FREAKING Bye '08.
What an exhausting year!! BUT, amidst the grievances that can be attributed to this year, there are also some great things and experiences, as with every year.
Probably one of my favorite things I did this year happened only a mere three weeks ago when I ran the White Rock half-marathon! Sadly, I have no photos yet... but I will post when I do. I am mostly proud because I literally trained MAYBE once a week and really did not run at all for two weeks before the race! I have no idea why. I think I have been a bit lethargic lately. Anyway, I finished the race in 2:28! Which basically comes down to a 11:22 minute mile. I'm pretty happy with that considering my training could barely be considered training, at any stretch of the imagination.

Well, since my other big, exciting news is that I have a suh-weet iPhone now, I finally am able to take pictures and, drum roll, POST THEM TO MY BLOG!! TA-DAH!!

So, before I get to posting, here is a Christmas breakdown -
Reese got a mountain of Princess clothing, Princess, slippers, Princess wands, crowns, earrings, jewels, etc. Pretty much just take a consensus of every item you own, attach a Princess theme to it, and Reese probably got one for Christmas. You think I'm kidding.
Niles got me a $100 gift certificate to Luke's Locker so I can get some really serious running shoes! I'm so excited. Plus, he is paying for me to go back to boot camp. That means, I will have to stop being lazy, and start getting some muscle back on this body!! I'm also super excited about it. I need to start 2009 off on an inspiring note, and boot camp is the perfect way to do that, as I already know well.

So, now that the year is coming to a close, it is funny to look back on how differently this year is ending than how it began. Completely different in nearly every single way. I really do love change, even as it intimidates me and I can get a bit anxious about the "unknown"... But I don't like to stay stagnant for too long, and if 2009 continues along the pace that the second half of 08 did, than it is going to be a fast-moving year!! I am truly excited about the coming year, and I am very excited about all the possibilities on the horizon. SO... going out with Reesey's best friend today was the perfect way to close out the year.

Presenting, more of the Reese and Emma Show (via Central Market & iPhone)

And here are some pics from our day at the library. Reese loves the computers because they have "Reesey Games" and she can sit there for hours.

Tonight we are off to hang out with some friends and Reesey's boyfriends (there are so many!) so it will be a nice way to say goodbye to 2008, BUT WE WILL DEFINITELY MISS Niles!! It is back to our usual routine of not spending New Years Eve together! =)

CHEERS TO EVERYONE AND HAPPY NEW YEAR!!

Girls and Boys

2008-11-13T21:52:00.002-07:00

This morning, after my long blog episode below, I watched as my two favorite people displayed two similar and yet distinct characteristics of women/girls and men/boys. Very interesting...

Niles, my nearly 28-year-old husband of 6 years is sick. But apparently so sick that it has reduced him to an infantile state. Apparently it is normal for adult men to regress substantially when inflicted by a sore throat and "sore skin" (niles' words). =)

Reese was happy as a clam when she woke up this morning. Smiling and content, she walked over to the kitchen table and started coloring while I made her breakfast: blueberry waffles and strawberries. As soon as I brought her food over, on her pretty pink plate with her pink plastic flamingo fork, she immediately stopped coloring, pulled her security blankie near and pushed away her plate of food. Bewildered and a bit frustrated I must admit, I chose to ignore the sudden moodswing and continue on with the rest of our morning routine.

Not content with that small display of discontent, Reese hopped down from her booster seat at the table and walked over to Niles, lying desperately on the couch. She stood there staring at him for a few minutes, with a mixture of emotions on her face, and without warning put her tiny hands on each cheek and burst into tears.

Eventually she made her way back to her plate of carbs and sugary syrup and went right back to smiling.

I tell you, this is not too different from an average evening between Niles and I.

Emphatic Confidence

2008-11-13T05:06:00.002-07:00

I know all my posts lately have been either serious or boring, so you'll have to forgive me. I don't have enough brainpower lately to be humorous or creative, unless it pertains to event-planning. =)

But I just had to write about this... I am reading My Utmost for His Highest, which has quickly become one of my favorite books (devo) of all time. I have gone back to it sporadically over the years, but I think this year has been the most consistent. It is full of so much wisdom and depth. Sometimes a little too much depth, and I don't quite grasp it, but most of the time it offers me some revelation that I have desperately needed.

I have been feeling a little burnt out lately. It seems as though most of my life now is CARES, which is awesome because I love it, but it is so easy to forget about life outside of our community. It's like I forget about my whole world, and all I can focus on are giveaways, donations, details and whether residents will attend and whether they will have a good time... I completely lose my bearings and friends turn into babysitters. =) I feel heavily convicted about it all at the moment because I can see that I've gotten out of balance. Thank God that He cares enough about me and loves me enough to reveal to me when I'm not giving enough to my relationships and my family.

Anyways, back to my devotion this morning...
Since I have been feeling all this heavy stuff, it was so fantastic to read these crucial points in today's Utmost:
"We have to battle through our moods into absolute devotion to the Lord Jesus, to get out of the hole-and-corner business of our experience into abandoned devotion to Him.
"... our faith must be built in strong emphatic confidence in Him"
"He is made unto us 'wisdom, and righteousness, and sanctification, and redemption'. How can we talk of making a sacrifice for the Son of God?!"
"All our fears are wicked, and we fear because we will not nourish ourselves in our faith. How can anyone who is identified with Jesus Christ suffer from doubt or fear?"

Seriously! How can I act as if I'm going to go each day and make such a sacrifice for God by believing Him and loving Him. ?! God has given me the greatest gift anyone can ever receive... He sees me as righteous and sanctified, faultless because of the gift of Jesus. If I do fear or doubt (which I do very often) it is absolutely because I have not nourished myself in my faith - in my God-given freedom!!

Anyways, I'm not great at writing articulately about things that move my spirit, but maybe you get something out of this that I didn't, or maybe you'll just have to read it yourself, because doesnt everyone own this book?!?! All I know is that I got a good kick in the butt this morning.

7th Wedding

2008-10-18T09:04:00.003-06:00

Okay, kids... Last weekend was my seventh wedding to bridesmaid.
It was probably one of, if not THE best dress I have ever worn in a wedding, which was awesome. But can I say, no matter how much I love a bridesmaid dress, IT WILL NEVER BE WORN AGAIN! It just will not happen.

The wedding was my friend Brie's. She married her boyfriend of 4 years, John, and they are absolutely perfect together. She looked more beautiful than I have ever seen her. Briezer is so funny, so true to herself, and completely without an ounce of pretension. She is such a blast to be around and I felt so honored to be in her wedding, considering that just 3 years ago we had never hung out before, even though I have known her for years. CHEERS TO BRIE!!

REHEARSAL DINNER

GETTING HER SCRAPBOOK WE GAVE HER

Mere, Amy and Becca

BEFORE THE WEDDING

Me and Mere

With Brie's nephew, Little Vincent

The Wedding and Reception!

And for those of you who know to ask... the flowers were beautiful! =)

My Husband is so smart.

2008-10-15T21:20:00.002-06:00

You should go read his blog...
Blog Action Day!
I had no idea what the whole Blog Action Day thing was, but Niles informed me that you are supposed to take one day to write all about one particular topic... for whatever reason.
Anyways, today's topic was poverty, and my brilliant husband wrote a great blog.
Check it out!!!
www.7zeroes.com

There's an Election going on?!

2008-10-09T22:26:00.000-06:00

Election from Amir on Vimeo.

In Every Season, You Are Still God

2008-10-04T07:49:00.002-06:00

If you don't already love Hillsong and immediately buy every CD that comes out, please at least buy their latest, This Is Our God. So far, this is absolutely my favorite. It is so powerful and everytime I listen, I feel the presence of God so strongly, and feel so refreshed and touched by God.
"Desert Song" is currently my favorite. The part in italics towards the bottom is such a great reminder to me that I have nothing to fear, nothing to be ashamed of, nothing to be depressed about, because ultimately God is God, and no matter what is going on around me or even IN me, He never changes, He never fails. No matter what mistakes I make, nothing can or will ever separate me from Him!!

DESERT SONG

This is my prayer in the desert
When all that's within me feels dry
This is my prayer in my hunger and need
My God is the God who provides

This is my prayer in the fire
In weakness or trial or pain
There is a faith proved
Of more worth than gold
So refine me Lord through the flame

I will bring praise
I will bring praise
No weapon formed against me shall remain
I will rejoice
I will declare
God is my victory and He is here

This is my prayer in the battle
When triumph is still on its way
I am a conqueror and co-heir with Christ
So firm on His promise I'll stand

ALL OF MY LIFE
IN EVERY SEASON
YOU ARE STILL GOD
I HAVE A REASON TO SING
I HAVE A REASON TO WORSHIP!!!

This is my prayer in the harvest
When favor and providence flow
I know I'm filled to be emptied again
The seed I've received I will sow

2008-09-23T19:20:00.000-06:00

So, Reese has been on a big sticker frenzy lately. She loves them, and they keep her occupied for quite some time, which is fantiastic.
So, at Target this morning, I saw they had a bunch of stickers on sale for 42 cents. (Seriously, 42 cents? why 42?)
Anyways, I grabbed some fish, some Tinkerbells, and some cute bunnies.

Only later when we were at home and Reese was sticking Bunny stickers all over Niles did we realize what those cute bunnies were communicating to our sweet girl.
Here's a small sample for you:

"Hi. Cram It." ???? Who the heck writes these things?!

So Niles kept me fully entertained reading off each sticker as Reese stuck them onto his arm. Here's a few of my favorites:

"look how nice I am not laughing at you"

(picture bunny holding a guitar) "I know it's loud. I just don't care" ?!?!?!?!

And my personal favorite:
"I have a dream, and in it something eats you."

And to think, someone is actually making money off of these.
Ahh, the American dream. =)

Ventage

2008-09-23T11:50:00.003-06:00

So something has been called to my attention.
I already sensed it as I wrote my blog on Sunday...

I mainly use this blog as a place to vent my frustrations, vent my feelings about life, child-rearing, everything... But I also probably spend too much time whining aobut my full schedule and how I never get to "rest", and not nearly enough time talking about the fullness of my life, and how much I ENJOY my daughter.

Let me put this in no uncertain terms... Having Reese is the most fulfilling, wonderful experience I have ever had the pleasure of enjoying. I love every little thing about that little girl. I love her crazy hair that I cannot fix smoothly to save my life. I love how she sings songs to herself, makes up music on her own, I love watching her do her puzzles, struggling to put each little piece exactly in its place. I love watching her color, concentrating so hard on holding that marker, pressing it so firmly onto the paper that I'm scared she is going to push the marker part out the other end! I love how she "works on her house", tearing her playhouse apart and pounding on it with her plastic hammer. I love how she wants to have books in her bed with her when she goes down for her nap. I love B!! I love that she always wants to wear dresses, and dancing shoes... And I love her so much, that I cry as I write this because any difficult days, any temper tantrums, any days where I have raised my voice at her when maybe I shouldn't have because I was that frustrated, any time where she has flat out ignored everything I am saying and completely disregards me, pale in comparison to the joy that she has brought to my life.

I say this so that when I have a second child, I can reassure myself, that while the "baby days" are difficult, the joys to come and the experience of loving a child and being loved by a child is immeasurable and incomprehensible. It so far surpasses my highest expectations of being a mom.

I had a very difficult first couple months being a mom, and a difficult time during the 7 month old to 9 month old phase, as well. But I can barely even remember that now. It all goes so fast. And the difficult days end - every 24 hours! Because even one day in a child's life changes them it seems. I remember looking at my friend's 2 year olds when Reese was only 1, and thinking, there is NO way Reese will be there in a year!

ALL THIS TO SAY, for all you moms out there having any difficulties, having tough days, days where you need help (!), days where you feel totally alone in this whole thing (despite your husband's best attempts!), days where you feel like your life is completely ripped out of your hands... IT GETS BETTER!! AND BETTER AND BETTER AND BETTER!!! Trust me.

The other day Reese came up to me on the couch, standing next to me while I sat, and she put her arm around my neck, stared smiling at me for a bit, and just leaned over and kissed my head. If that doesn't rock your world, than I don't know what could.

Getting Lola in on the Photo Booth Action

2008-09-21T10:33:00.001-06:00

First, just us...

At this point, Lola is not too happy with me...

Not-So-Sleepy Sunday

2008-09-21T09:19:00.003-06:00

So, I'm a church-skipper today. Not feeling so great, exhausted from the weekend, and really needing some down-time. However, seeing as I am now resigned to the house due to our one-car household, this also means I am constrained to our home with my preciously high-energy highly-emotional toddler who, as I write, is hollering in frustration over the collapse of her Lego tower. The 5th said Tower we have constructed in the last 10 minutes. SO, down-time is not something I will have the luxury of enjoying.

Here are the things I would like to do this morning:

1. Lay down on the couch for 10 consecutive minutes (or more)
2. Finish my TIME magazine
3. Sit still
4. READ.
5. Not watch Dora, Charlie & Lola, or Go, Diego, Go.
6. Drink coffee; maybe even 2 cups
7. Take a shower by myself
8. Go for a run outside ALONE

Here are the things I will end up doing this morning, and already have done, since 6:30 am when Reese woke up:

1. Lay down for a teasing 3 minutes before hopping up to respond to shrieks of "mommy"
2. Start 3 separate articles in TIME before #1 ensues
3. Sit still not long enough to know how awesome it feels to be sitting.
4. Read Angelina Ballerina, Berenstein Bears, and Miss Mopp's Lucky Day.
5. Watch Charlie & Lola
6. Pour 3 cups of coffee, but only drink 1/4 of each cup before #1 ensues.
7. Will end up taking a shower with Reese either outside the door watching and crying to come in, or with Reese at my feet crying because the soap is getting in her eyes.
8. Running doesn't seem so important anymore.

Okay, let it just be known, that Reesey is just in a phase where Mommy is the only one she will cry to, or lean on, call for right now, which in some ways is sweet, but also pretty exhausting. I love my little girl with all my heart, but I would really love some alone time at the moment. =)

Add to Words I HATE...

2008-09-16T21:31:00.000-06:00

flesh.

blech... it's a horrible word!!

Must Share...

2008-09-09T22:38:00.003-06:00

So I'm pretty excited because I found some great music lately, as WELL as made a pretty sweet workout playlist.
If you have spent any time around me and my iPod, you know we have a very close relationship. I spend ridiculous amounts of time looking for good music, and even more so, GREAT workout music. I can't even fathom working out without something perfect to listen to; and that is usually my biggest complaint with any workout class. I'm so tired of spinning to classic rock! NOTHING against classic rock, mind you, I'm always up for some Boston or Steve Miller Band, but I just cannot get excited about working out to "Sweet Home Alabama","Jungle Love" or any other Eagles songs anymore! Seriously!!

SO, here's what I would call Playlist of the Year.
If you need to get pumped up for running your marathon commitments, 5Ks, or other various energy expenditures, THIS, I promise you, will do the job. I'm so proud of myself!

So proud, I just might burn you a copy if you ask. =) (and before you get all worked up, know that just because I choose to exercise to the likes of Girlicious or Pussycat Dolls, does not mean I own fishnet hose, wear bustiers or even enjoy kissing girls. it's all for the calories, people!!)

1. Hot N Cold - katy perry
2. So What - pink
3. Like Me - girlicious
4. Disturbia - rihanna
5. Sorry - madonna
6. Forever - chris brown
7. When I Grow Up - pussycat dolls
8. 2 of You - danity kane
9. New Workout Plan - kanye west
10. Piece of Me - britney
11. Move Shake Drop Remix - dj laz
12. Damaged - danity kane
13. Do It Well - jennifer lopez
14. Ooh Ooh Baby - britney
15. Low - flo rida
16. Stronger - kanye west
17. 4 Minutes - madonna
18. Gimme More - britney
19. I Kissed A Girl - katy perry
20. Here I Come - the roots
21. Say This Sooner - the almost
22. Sexy Back - justin timberlake
23. Radar - britney
24. Unconditional - the bravery
25. Viva la Vida - coldplay
26. Mercy - duffy
27. Break the Ice - britney
28. What You Waiting For? - gwen stefani
29. Holiday (Faded Ending) - green day
30. Charlotte - air traffic

Okay, so my list actually goes to 61 songs, but I won't bore you.
Anyways, hope you enjoy!

Oh, and if you haven't already, check out The Weepies.

My Little Princess

2008-09-08T08:01:00.000-06:00

Reese and Emma'S playdate.
So cute.

WHEW!!

2008-08-30T23:18:00.003-06:00

What a week!!!

Tonight's luau at our complex was the culmination of a week of total exhaustion and accomplishment. It's unreal how one week can bring so much growth, change, emotion... I'm relieved that it's over!! I had a great time at the luau, but I am definitely glad to stop thinking about it, for sure. Next events on the agenda are a birthday party, bridal shower, and ice cream social THIS WEEK. Not to mention, a huge meeting on Friday - Reese's new teacher!! WHOAH. Reese loved Ms. Pam last year, so I'm hoping the attachment wasn't strong enough to keep her from enjoying her new teacher. I'm sure she's adaptable. =) But I'm really excited. Mostly I'm excited to meet the person who will begin teaching her as of NEXT TUESDAY!! I love love love love love the company of my daughter. But I also love pre-school. =) I love that she gets to have the interaction with the other kids, that she has the structure that I'm not that great at giving her, as much as I try, and I love how much thought and time and energy goes into the program she is enrolled in. They truly try to help parents feel they are not missing out on their children even in those mere 10 hours they are away from us. I CAN'T WAIT! I know she will love it.

This week also brought a Cowboys pre-season game with my sweet friend Sarah, "Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants" with Jackie and Stace, and a life-saving playdate for Reese and Emma! There was a lot going on.

Friday... wow. Are you kidding?! Friday was out of control. I have not had a day that long in such a long time!! Since we had to get ready for the luau, Friday was the day I had set aside for a lot of planning, purchasing, visualizing, etc. Of course, I didn't really take into consideration that I ALSO had timesheets due, expense reports due, the monthly prayer morning!!, A DENTAL APPOINTMENT IN DALLAS, AND A STAFF LUNCH, not to mention everyday work!!! ARE YOU KIDDING?!!?!?!
So, my day was packed, and by the time it was 5, I finally sat down for about 30 minutes before Reese woke up from her nap (oh yeah, did I mention I had her with me during ALL of this - including dental appointment!). And, okay, noooo I did not pray all morning like my schedule had called for. I did however, pray in my car as I was running errands. And I really mean that. =) I had a lot to pray about!!

So, by the time evening rolled around, I did some grocery shopping, somewhat in a fog of disorientation and exhaustion, and went home to bake 4 boxes of brownies for the luau.

TODAY... Holy cow. Today. Luau extraordinaire!! Party was successful, and I'm sure Niles will post pictures on his blog. It was such a great time, and the setup was awesome, the food was awesome, the people are ALWAYS awesome, and overall, I am beyond thrilled. We got a water volleyball net (and ball), a DJ, a pig which had been roasting since 4 am... So many people came out and I actually think they are still out there.

I'm soooo tired because as soon as it was all over, we still had to take everything down, take all the dishes up, and CLEAN them all. blah. It's 12:45, and I'm still up, basically because this is the first time I have been able to sit by myself, and just... yeah. It seems so rare now that I get these moments, and I can tell that even though I wish I had more of them, I am right in my element, doing what I am doing. Because I feel energized, I am excited, and I am already looking forward to the next party! I absolutely love my residents so much, and I feel so blessed and happy being where we are. I absolutely feel that God has placed us here for a reason, and I don't doubt it for a second. I forget that we have only been here for only 2 months!

Thank God for purpose and change and relationships.

Lately...

2008-08-25T21:05:00.002-06:00

Lord is life ever busy right now. Maybe that's why I physically feel sad when The Hills is over. But seriously, life is full of wonderful things right now, but I have to say, I would love to feel like I actually have time to do anything relaxing, rejuvenating, refreshing...

I really just want an hour by myself to sit, read, not think, not plan, not check emails or answer my phone, and escape.

Let me be clear that I am totally thrilled with my job, my opportunities... even the busy-ness is great and right up my alley. But I also know it gets really easy to slip into survival mode, neglect relationships or family time, and let the obligations overtake the joys. I am determined to ensure that my family gets what they need from me, as well as ensure that I get what I need from life. And most of that means allowing God to really fill me up when I get empty... really allow Him to fire me up when I burn out... and listen when I hear the prompting of His voice to slow down, stop talking, and mostly stop worrying!!! Everyday I have to remind myself that God only gives us the grace to deal with today, because He specifically tells us not to stress over tomorrow because it will take care of itself.

Right now I find myself giving out sooo much, and expending so much that it's not till later that I realize I am exhausted or that I can really take in the experience that has already past.

Well, I know that I am walking in God's purpose for my life. I know that Niles and I together are on the path God has set before us, and we will continue that way, knowing that at times we will fail, we will screw up, and at times we will actually accomplish things, and make progress, and be successful! The objective is to make sure that God takes pleasure in our lives and is blessed by what we do. And right now I will have to realize that sometimes that means stepping back, maybe stepping out, not being in control of every situation, knowing I can't fix everything, everyone. Realizing that I may disappoint people because I finally take care of myself instead of them... And I will totally be uncomfortable!!

I'm guarding my heart, letting God direct my steps, my words, trusting Him to go before me and make a way for me as He always has. Trusting that He will answer my prayers and hear what's in my heart... And I know He does. Time and again He has shown that my prayers do not fall on deaf ears, and why I ever doubt, I do not know.

Some more pictures!

2008-08-19T21:27:00.001-06:00

Me and Jessica at the Legacy Ball her church held.

And with our mommas

That was an amazing night!
I love ya Jess and I'm so glad you invited me to come. I will expect an invitation to the head table at each and every one.
=)

What I think about the Hills.

2008-08-19T21:13:00.003-06:00

Okay, since you asked...

Loved it. Loved the premiere and for whatever reason, thirty minutes just does not seem long enough for this gem.
I know, I know, It is the obsession of no-life, too-much-time, teeny boppers... I just cannot get enough!!

Here are the reasons I should not love The Hills:
1. I'm 30.
2. I can never have hair like that.
3. I'm 30.
4. I will never have clothes like that.
5. I'm 30.
6. I am a mother, and those girls should scare any parent of a girl.
7. Lauren has nothing to say on any date she ever goes on. Really nothing interesting to say... ever.
8. Heidi absolutely reminds me of my stupidity in past relationships and noone wants to remember that stuff!
9. Spencer.
10. I'm THIRTY.

But I can't stop it... It is an unstoppable force!! It is the proverbial train wreck that must be watched over and over!
So, since it will not and cannot be contained, I must comment.

I love Audrina. She has made some dumb decisions (justin bobby) but she seems like a good friend, maybe a little naive, but pretty level-headed. I think Lo was completely and totally out of line with her little attitude in the final conversation and it was so infuriating to watch! But, this will make this season that much more interesting.

Why is is that Lauren seems like she never says anything interesting... at all?! ESPECIALLY on dates?! I don't get the fascination. I don't. She is beautiful, she is well-dressed and fashionable, she has great hair... and she seems like a good friend, albeit a little Type-A, but why are we interested?!?!

Whitney - flawless.
Spencer - I mean, seriously!!??1 Is he for real?! Does he know the level of disgust people feel towards him? Is he content in his soul with that?! Oy. The boy needs to be sent... away, or... something. Just banish him!

I Love American Swimmers!

2008-08-17T20:12:00.004-06:00

Geez, Louise.
Are all our American swimmers required to be great-looking?! (the boys anyway)

I'm such a nerd. I just watched some of my DVRed Olympics and saw a few swimmers get gold medals... I freaking cry every dang time I hear the American anthem.

I taught Reese to say "Go America!" every time she watches the swim meets.

Sliding

2008-08-16T21:17:00.001-06:00

Such a Girly Girl

2008-08-16T09:44:00.001-06:00

Quiz

2008-08-16T05:40:00.001-06:00

I feel loved when...

The Five Love Languages

My Primary Love Language is Acts of Service

My Detailed Results:
Acts of Service:	10
Quality Time:	8
Words of Affirmation:	7
Receiving Gifts:	3
Physical Touch:	2

About this quiz

Unhappiness in relationships is often due to the fact that we speak different love languages. It can be helpful to know what language you speak and what language those around you speak.

Tag 3 people so they can find out what their love language is.

Take the Quiz!
Check out the Book

Grrrr

2008-08-14T14:40:00.001-06:00

I'm having a rough day.
=(

FINALLY. Some pictures!!!

2008-08-10T22:35:00.002-06:00

Okay, so after all your ranting about my non-posting, you get like 5 posts in a few days, AND, PICTURES! What the heck?!?! No, I still cannot find my camera cord, so these are all from Niles' phone. Luckily, he has an overpriced, fancy schmancy phone that takes magnificent photos.

So, to catch up...
These first two are from the FC Dallas game. The glorious, hot, hot, smoldering hot day watching David Beckham. (I love you Niles.)

We've learned recently that the way to get Reese to smile, is not to say "cheese", but to say "B". B is her blankie, B is her muse, B is everywhere. B is us, and we are nothing without B. I should probably spell it Bea, since we refer to "her" as a person. "Bea is taking a bath". "Bea is so tired, she needed to stay home - mommy did not forget her." "Bea, for cryin out loud, would you please stop slathering yourself in tomato sauce and dirt!"

These last two are of the kitten that many of you have yet to meet. The kitten who has started to make me realize why I've always preferred dogs. This cat goes by many names. A few of our favorites: "Nighttime Eye Gouger"; "Leaping Way Too High at My Face"; "Claws Too Long"; "Freak Out Furball"; "Where the Hell Did You Come From, Stabbing At Me Like That".
But, oh she is cute.

This is when Reese watercolor painted her back.

If you don't already know...

2008-08-10T17:04:00.004-06:00

The Olympics are on. =)

So I'm totally committed to watching as much as possible of this year's sports. Even if some may be ridiculously boring or without any of the melodramatic cutaway stories that I love.

The story I learned today just completely broke my heart, though. In a good way. If you haven't already heard, you absolutely must look up the story of Lin Hao, the little Chinese boy who walked with Yao Ming in the opening ceremonies. He was a hall monitor at his Chinese school during the earthquake. He crawled out from the rubble, went back in two or three times to RESCUE other children, and then walked another 7 miles to go find help for other children!! (I'm summarizing) It's just amazing. And not to mention he's totally adorable, and itty-bitty cute.

I'm totally excited about women's gymnastics this year, and I watched Michael Phelps win the 400 IM this afternoon. My DVR is doing some serious overtime right now, as just one of my Summer Olympics "shows" is 8 hours long. So far today, Reese and I caught up on Dara Torres and her relay team, May and Walsh doing some beach volleyball, and now we are watching the U.S. play China in men's basketball. This could potentially be the one time I will cheer for Kobe or Dwyane Wade especially.

It has been a very long week... One I am at once glad and sad to say is now over. Niles' parents have been here, which is always great, and we had a pretty successful CARES event Friday... but all in all, there have been many instances this week, including a very bad stomach-ache today which almost had me in tears, where I was ready to close the book on this week.

Note to self: Never schedule a dental implant, evening CARES event, in-laws coming in town, setup for job orientation, late movie night with friends, and the Olympic opening ceremonies in a one-week time period. It's just too much.

Another note to self: When scheduling the Olympic Ceremonies in the future, remind self to purchase ticket to be present, and also remind self to have a million dollars.

Additional note to self: Also remember, if they are asking you to schedule Opening Ceremonies, dont' accept less than a million dollars, for cryin out loud.

Itching...

2008-08-09T04:19:00.002-06:00

I have baby fever.
Bad.
It's so bad.

We're in negotiations. Niles' excuse is that we hit the jackpot on our first try (see adorable daughter hanging face down on the big girl swing... top right corner) and we are just setting ourselves up for disappointment. =) Well, as weird or sweet or maybe a little inappropriate, but loving, as that is, I THINK I just might have a little more love in there for another one. Perfect or not. Seriously... it's sooo time.

sigh.

Mi Vida Loca

2008-08-07T07:10:00.004-06:00

I have no point for writing, except that since I have been out of the loop for such a while, I feel the need to consistently update. Life is good. I have had an interesting, busy two weeks!! Last Saturday (almost two weeks ago) I went out and trained with my new job team, for the White Rock Half-Marathon I foolishly signed myself up for. We had to run 5 miles, because I guess that's where we are supposed to be at right now. Yeah, right! BUT, I knew if I signed up to run with everybody, my pride would definitely not let me quit. So, I ran the ENTIRE 5 miles! I have to say, I'm not a good running buddy. I am so impatient and I was determined to find out my pace, if I could really run the entire way, and how capable I was of doing this half-marathon thingamajigger. Anyways, I have just determined that running/training by myself is probably best because otherwise I am guilt-ridden thinking of reasons why I would abandon someone on the running trail.

Sunday afternoon we had a pool party for my apartment manager. It was a total blast, and so many people came out! We are lucky enough (both as a CARES team and as RESIDENTS) to have several restauranteurs who live with us and are overwhelmingly generous!! I am amazed at the kindness of our residents and the heart of our community. It is so enjoyable to be around, and it definitely makes our job here much easier. We are very very blessed.

So this week I was supposed to go in and get my dental implant. I went in, got put under anasthesia which was unnecessary, but totally up to me, and I love that happy anasthesized place I get to go to once every 6 months or so. =) Anyways, during the surgery, my Dr. realized that there was not enough bone for the implant to stay in, and he ended up taking the entire thing out, doing a bone graft and having me reschedule for another 4 months from now!! GRRR. So, I have seriously had this big swollen left cheek for about 5 days. It's sweet. Really beautiful.

Well, it's 4:15 am. I cannot for the life of me fall asleep, which tends to be the case lately. No matter how tired I am. Last night, Reese came and got in bed with me, which is sooo sweet and sooo precious, but also keeps me from totally RESTING. So, on top of that, I had the longest, most odd day today... A lot of things on my mind tonight and until about Noon tomorrow, I will probably not relax. SO, it looks like I'm in for a night of random Summer Olympics, catching up on Project Runway (which I'm shockingly not as into this time around), and of course, blogging for no good reason. Cheers!

Daily Funny from Niles

2008-08-02T12:05:00.003-06:00

Niles: "Okay, if you were saying the phrase, 'to make ends meet' how would you spell the word 'meet'?"

Me: "Meet"

Niles: "Oh. You mean it's not 'meat'? Like to make ends 'meat'... Like you're working to bring food to the table?"

Me (hand over mouth, jaw nearly hitting table, eyes starting to fill with tears of laughter); "Uh, no."

Niles: "Doesn't that make sense? Making ends to turn them into meat?"

Such is my life. =)

Hangin Tough

2008-08-01T02:41:00.002-06:00

No, the title should not mislead you to believe I am actually attending the sacred revival of New Kids that will soon be in my area. Although, I would LOVE to!
No, I am just referring to my current status since my last blog two months ago!!

I can't believe it has been this long since I've written, but actually I can. It has been a roller coaster ride since that last blog. So much has changed. New apartment, new job, new ministry opportunities, new kitten, new friends (not to replace the old, just bringing in some new!)... Basically life is about 180 degrees from what it was at the end of May. Niles and I are now the official CARES team for our new complex. We hold parties, brunches, basically just "serve" our community in any way possible... and we LOVE it. We have a great apartment, we are meeting a ton of new people and we really are enjoying the opportunity to bring something to the table of our community. And if I am at all enticing you to follow in our stead, let me know because I would love to recruit you. =)

But there have also been a ton of changes going on around us as well, that have nothing in particular to do with us, but that are profoundly affecting our lives. All in all, when I say life has done a 180 in two months, I sincerely mean it!

So, here's what's going down lately: had our third Book Club meeting where we talked about "The Shack", which I have to say, thoroughly disappointed me!! After all the hype, I guess my expectations were set so high, there was no where to go but down. Granted, I did have to rush through it, I didn't finish it, and I didn't start it until the day before Book Club, SO... could be that circumstances may have affected my judgment. I went and saw Mamma Mia which I loved, took Reese to go see Veggie Tales with her BFF, Emma... We went to the FCDallas game where I sat 50 yards from the GLORIOUS David Beckham. I even held Reese up so she could get a good look at quite possibly, the most attractive specimen on the planet. She needs early exposure. I just don't want her to settle, ya know?! I must say, it was entirely too smoking hot outside to BE outside, but we braved the heat to watch the FCD team take down L.A. What was more enjoyable was that we got to spend time with our dear friends (who abandoned us to go live in some ridiculously barren place like an HOUR away)and their son, Reese's future sugar daddy, Carson. They are so cute together. They copy everything each other does, including running, screaming, and leaving a path of destruction in their wake. They also sat next to each other at the restaurant and fed each other from their plates. Seriously. Carson gave Reese some of his corn dog, right off the stick, and Reese would hand Carson a french fry. It reminds me of my early dating days with Niles. Except I would never give away a french fry.

Hidden Joys

2008-05-31T13:25:00.002-06:00

You know, sometimes you realize when you become a parent that there are hidden joys of parenting that no one has ever told you about. Things that only parents could know or understand... and probably want to keep to themselves because they are such precious little treasures.
Joys are that so deeply hidden, so tightly wrapped up in the secret society of parenthood..

Let me give you an example:
Reese and I came in from the pool today, and I was stripping her down and got her Dora swimpants off (a process I have found is much easier if I just rip each side in half), turned to the sink to find a rubber band or some other equally forgettable task, and turned to the sight of Reese peeing all down her leg and onto the floor mat by the shower.
You see? A joy that only a parent can possibly understand.

Another:
A couple weeks ago (and this is approximately the third time this has happened), Niles went in to wake Reese up from her nap and walked in to find a little girl who resembled my sweet angelic daughter, covered head to toe in poop. That's right. poop. She must have realized, which strikes me as odd since she's been doing this for two and a half years, that sometimes sitting uncomfortably in a full diaper could signify a bigger problem, and she sought to rectify that. I mean, who can blame her?!
Oh... the utter joy.

Lastly:
A friend of mine came to the house and we were discussing the particular shirt she was wearing and how she felt it wasn't flattering for her bosoms, when Reese came in and shouted, "Boobs!", lifted up her shirt, and pointed to her own chest.
Seriously?!

THANK GOD!!!

2008-05-22T07:51:00.000-06:00

I'm sad it's over, but soooo thrilled about this...

team COOK!!!!

WOW.

2008-05-19T22:25:00.000-06:00

Did anyone watch the finale of House?!??!?!

Thoughts!??!?!

A little more light-hearted...

2008-05-17T22:30:00.004-06:00

The Ever-Present Dilemma in our household:

Shows I HATE:
How It's Made
Good Eats
Mythbusters
UFC fighting
Star Trek

Shows Niles LOVES:
How It's Made
Good Eats
Mythbusters
UFC Fighting
Star Trek

Need I say more?!

Poster Child for 'Almost'

2008-05-16T07:24:00.002-06:00

Normally my posts are pretty light reading, so you'll have to forgive me today. I'm not feeling so easy and light!!

I'm so tired of being the "Almost Got It" girl. I am tired of only hearing God's voice when doors are shutting in my face that I thought I was supposed to open. Lately it seems that I'm often hearing from God only when I'm being disappointed in the things that aren't working out as I expected. This week I heard a resounding "NO" from God about something I was almost certain was supposed to be. And of course, I didn't just hear it from God, I heard it from several sources. It is so hard to hear that you missed the mark, weren't good enough, weren't quite what was needed. I'm not feeling sorry for myself, I'm just frustrated that I keep getting disappointed.

Clearly this means I'm not listening to God in several areas. I am obviously not setting my goals by what I hear God saying, clearly not praying enough about the next step in life, and VERY clearly not being content about where God has us now.

If you know me well, you know I am absolutely the most impatient person on the planet - hence the road rage and unfortunate compulsive tendencies! So, waiting for God's voice is never the easiest thing for me, nor is being content. I'm always wanting to know what is next, what can we do to change where we are , how can we better our situation... Those things are not necessarily always bad, but they can definitely cause me to lose sight of my true purpose and the big picture. It's very likely that God is teaching me to wait on Him. To ask, wait and listen to ONLY Him, instead of trying to force open doors that only end up bringing me disappointment and frustration, as well as feeling pretty sucky about myself!!!

I realize God is not testing me, only teaching me, but it doesn't make it any less difficult. I'm tired of being the 'almost' girl. I could write my story about being that girl.

You Should Download

2008-05-15T08:43:00.003-06:00

1. Tristan Prettyman - "Hello"
2. Duffy - "Rockferry"
3. Lavendar Diamond - "Imagine Our Love"
4. HOLLY CONLAN - "Bird" and "Holly Conlan"

I'm a little bias on the last one, as she is my second cousin. And, yes, I will brag about that as much as possible, because she is AMAZING and soon she will be famous and I will brag even more.

VEGAS photos

2008-05-11T22:12:00.005-06:00

Unfortunately, they are alll from the Palms poolside... We just sucked at taking photos. I know, Jess... SACRILEGE!!
This is in the limo on the way to Planet Hollywood

Lauren and I at the Palms pool

Lauren, Sarah, Casey Messer, one of the contestants and me

The four girls!

In our cabana

The girls with Steve Patterson, one of the finalists who has his own website, www.hollywoodpresstv.com, where he interviews celebrities...

Ever thought about this?

2008-05-09T11:37:00.001-06:00

So, I'm watching 'Annie' with Reese this morning, and one line in particular jumped out at me.
It's never really struck me as funny in the past, but seems hysterical now...

"Mr. Warbucks LIKES cheeky orphans!'

Is that funny to anyone else?!

I love her!!

2008-05-09T08:35:00.001-06:00

I'm back!

2008-05-07T21:35:00.003-06:00

Vegas was a blast. A total and complete blast. Unfortunately, I have no pictures to post as of now, because I cannot find my camera cord to post them!!
In a nutshell, here are the details..
Sunday, 3:45 am
WOKE UP and left for the airport at 4:30 am to check in for my standby flight, scheduled for 6:25 am. Got to Vegas at 8:30 am and met my girls and a fellow Extra finalist, Steve at the airport where we were picked up by a Planet Hollywood limo and taken to the hotel to check in. We got in our bathing suits and headed down to the casino to take a taxi to the Palms hotel, where there was a cabana waiting for us!! We had a whole private area reserved and got everything for free. We also got to go up to the private pool area over the bar (aka Hugh Hef's pool when he's there; interesting fact: there are two large windows at the bottom of the pool that are directly over the bar. hmmm...). After our hangout at the pool, we went back to our hotel and got ready for the nighttime. We ate dinner at KOI. Now, for those of you who know me well, you will understand my trepidation at eating at a purely sushi restaurant!!! I was a little freaked out, but since it was all being paid for, I knew I just had to suck it up and try something new. It was shockingly good. I think what I normally eat and do not enjoy, are the sushi rolls... This time we just had all different kinds of tuna, which was awesome. After Koi, we hung out a bit more down in the casino, and eventually headed over to the Wynn, to go dancing at Tryst, where we ALSO had VIP everything and a private booth!! IT was sooo much fun! Those are the only pictures I have, because they are on the Tryst website. SO, here they are:

We had such a fantastic time, and I'm so glad I got to go.

BUT, I must say... as great as the trip was, as FANTASTIC as the trip was, my first thought when I woke up the next morning was my little girl and Niles, and how ready I was to see them. I'm sure if I would have stayed another night I would have had a great time. But I was so ready to get on that plane and head home for my family. And, what was ALSO great, was that I felt that way!!! I love that feeling of having a family. I love being a mommy and a wife and having that in my life. It was wonderful to know that as much as I enjoy my friends and being adventurous and girls nights... all of it... I have something so great to look forward to when I get home to my family. When I got home and saw Reese in the car and saw how excited she was to see me, my heart leapt!!!

Reese had her first "school concert" last night. It was absolutely precious, and as soon as I find my darn cable cord, I will get those pictures up! The only bummer is that it was SOOOO packed in the sanctuary that I had to sit up in the balcony! So needless to say, my pictures are completely useless. Her class sang, "Praise Him, all you little children". It was AWESOME!!! And Reese had a large cheering section, so when her class came out on stage, someone yelled "Yeah Reese!" and she stopped dead in her tracks on stage and started looking around everywhere. It was great.

Anyways, until I get photos, that's it for now!!!

PEACE.

And firing him makes sense because....??

2008-04-30T20:32:00.002-06:00

DALLAS— The Dallas Mavericks announced today that they have relieved Avery Johnson of his coaching duties. Johnson became the eighth coach in Mavericks history on March 19, 2005. He collected a record of 194-70 (.735) during his tenure with a postseason record of 23-24 (.489).

“I would like to thank Avery for his valuable contributions to the Mavericks organization,” President of Basketball Operations/General Manager Donnie Nelson said. “Over the past four years, he has been an integral part of our team’s success. We wish AJ nothing but the very best in his future endeavors.
”
In his first full season as head coach (2005-06), Johnson guided the Mavericks to 60 wins and their first appearance in the NBA Finals. He became the fastest coach to reach 50 wins (62 games), coached the Western Conference All-Star team and was named the NBA’s Coach of the Year.

In 2006-07, Johnson led Dallas to a franchise-record 67 wins (67-15 overall) and the NBA’s best record. The mark was also the sixth best in league history. Following a 10-0 month of February, Johnson garnered Western Conference Coach of the Month honors, an award he won three times in his career.

This past season, Johnson became the fastest coach in NBA history to reach 150 wins with a victory over Memphis on November 17, 2007. He accomplished that feat in just 191 games.

“It is never easy to relieve a coach of his duties, especially one of Avery’s caliber,” Owner Mark Cuban said. “He is a talented coach and I want to thank him for his efforts over the last four years and what he has done for this franchise. We wish him well in the future."

My Melodramatic Ode to Avery.

2008-04-30T14:41:00.005-06:00

Dear Avery: I'm sorry you have a scummy boss. I'm sorry you have dead weight, so-called "All Star" players on your team that can't do jack for all the talk and hype around them (and I'm NOT talking about Dirk). I'm sorry that you are getting SCREWED for mistakes that aren't your own! I know that you read my blog daily to find out how I'm doing so I want you to know I'm sad that you will be leaving. Just wanted you to know. =)

I'M SOOOOOOOOOO FIRED UP right now!!! I'm so pissed at Cuban. So pissed that he is such an idiot for getting rid of Devin Harris and bringing in a 50 year old formerly great player who has done nothing good for our team, and for that matter, is probably largely responsible for how we ended up this season. So pissed that instead of firing some of the players who are not performing like they should we are firing an amazing coach who has, in the barely three years that he has been coaching has taken us to the finals, and to a record-breaking season.

I am such a huge fan of Avery. Such a huge fan of him as a person of integrity and character and as a coach. I'm so mad that he is not getting respect for what a great job he has done.

Wherever he goes, I will be a fan. He could coach Golden State for that matter, and I will cheer for them!!!! That's how much I love that guy!!! He could even coach San Antonio... I will cross to that dark side for him.

Mark Cuban.... kiss off.
Josh Howard... get it together.
Devin Harris... COME HOME!
Jason Kidd... retire.

Dirk... love you!
brandon bass... love you too!

Good Morning!

2008-04-25T09:32:00.002-06:00

SO, this morning Ive checked emails, made oatmeal, strawberries and eggs for Reese (okay, I just cut the strawberries...), cleaned house, and watched the American Idol elimination (which was absolutely RIDICULOUS on so many levels!!! Carly deserves so much better!! I'm tired of millions of teeny bopper girls who by voting for the little boys on the show who have such limited talent and who just absolutely do not deserve this are sending home perfectly legitimate, and fantastically talented people!!!! Whatever) I missed on Tuesday.

But there is a special little air of excitement around me today...
That's because I'M GOING TO VEGAS!!!

My friend Lauren was picked as one of the four finalists for Extra's special correspondent contest!! She actually went a few weekends ago to Vegas with another friend of ours (b/c I couldn't go, mind you), and now they are bringing her back again next weekend, and I GET TO GO!!!!

It's only for one night, but I don't care. I'm so freaking excited!! I know Vegas is one of those places you either love or hate, but I just want to GO. I've always wanted to go, and now I am going, and not only am I going, but I will be with some great friends, and getting a fabulous night out.

WOO HOO!!

You should really check out...

2008-04-16T14:04:00.002-06:00

The following...

1. There Will Be Blood.
Completely awesome and way better than I expected. Should totally have won Best Picture over No Country for Old Men!!

2. The King of Kong.
Documentary about these guys who compete to get the highest score ever on Donkey Kong!! So totally did not expect to get emotionally invested in this movie! I practically cried and wanted to kick one of the major characters in his family jewels. If he had them.

3. Felicity.
I'm on season two. I forgot how much I used to love this show!!! I don't think I even got past the first season when it was on TV, and now I cannot for the sake of me remember why. It is greatness. The goth roommate of Felicity is my favorite character, along with her boss at Dean and Deluca.

4. Big Love.
The HBO series about Bill Paxton and his polygamist lifestyle. Actually much more entertaining than you would think. One of those shows that you should totally not find endearing, and yet you just can't help yourself!

Tagged

2008-04-07T21:28:00.003-06:00

Jess tagged me, so let's see if I can think of 7 things you may not know about me...

1. I have a specific shower routine that I have to do every time I shower. I wash my face first, then shampoo my hair, then condition, shave if I need to and soap up, then rinse conditioner. Then I'm out, HAVE to completely wipe my feet dry before I will step out... If I go out of order, well... I just don't.

2. I have NINE magazine subscriptions. But, before judging me crazy, consider first that I used to buy half of those magazines every month. I'm literally sending Reese to college on the money I've saved through doing subscriptions.

3. I really nearly cry every time the Mavericks lose.

4. I own the movie, Crossroads. And Center Stage.

5. I am a talk radio fanatic. NPR on Saturdays, ESPN all day Monday through Friday. After 9/11 I listened to AM News radio every day for like, two years.

6. I am obsessed with the BBC version of The Office. I own the entire set and watch it over and over and over. I love Ricky Gervais.

7. If I could spend an entire day with one person, just for the heck of it, it would be Amy Poehler. I adore everything about her.

If I read this again, I'm sure I will edit it to death, thinking and rethinking and rethinking in my OCD way. So I am going to let this be my 7 things, and wrap this puppy up.

DES, WHERE IS MY LITTLE ISABEAU?!?!? GET THAT GIRL OUT!!!

Jumping with Emma!

2008-03-28T21:39:00.002-06:00

Oh my gosh, Reese has a girlfriend! YAY! It's about time. I mean, girls, I love your sons. I love Reese having options in case she and Carson don't work out (I'm just kidding, but as you can see, they tend to gravitate towards each other's lips) ... but a girl's gotta have her girls!

So Rebekah and I took our girls to a bouncy house place today and they were great together. It was so cute.
Reese was a bit suspicious of the looming inflatable houses of bounce terror and she was just throwing tantrums right and left. I basically forced her to endure a obstacle course of fun. I mean, what kind of mother am I?! But eventually she overcame her fear and at the end I had to deal with the temper tantrum of not wanting to leave. Typical. All in all, the day was a success! And we got to have some grownup talk, too. You know, talking about our un-grownups.

Lotsa Pictures!

2008-03-28T21:27:00.003-06:00

LOTSA LOTSA pictures to post!!

First off, I love taking Reese to the park. We are fortunate enough to have a lot of options for parks in this area and recently I found my total favorite. It's never too crowded, and it has a pond, sand volleyball court, a toddler playground and a "big girl" playground. Its awesome. We took bread to feed the ducks, who of course wouldn't come near us, and most of that experience was spent holding Reese back from falling into the pond, where, digustingly, I found a huge dead fish floating. So we may just stay near the land next time around.

Okay, and here's from Easter.
My mom was sweet enough to get Reese a really cute dress and Easter basket so we had several different Easter egg hunts, and we kept her in that dress until she crashed from the insane amount of sugar I allowed her to consume as well as the constant running around resulting from that sugar consumption. But I promise, I made her eat like, TONS of her gummy veggie vitamins to make up for it.

ok.

2008-03-28T20:12:00.001-06:00

so i suck at brackets!

In this season of brackets...

2008-03-26T12:10:00.002-06:00

I am too out of the loop to know how to make my NCAA bracket this year, and I'm certainly too discouraged by my Dallas team to make any sort of prediction or even talk about basketball. Period.

So, my "bracket" right now will just be trying to predict the next ten weeks of American Idol eliminations. =)
Okay, I will admit it. I completely overshot Chikezie's chances. But at least, ya know, he had that ONE. GREAT. NIGHT!!

This week I'm calling Kristy Lee Cook - OUT. Seriously. It's time. Too many chances, now matter how sweet and likable she is, she needs to go.

Next week - Ramiele. Out. Cute. Sweet. Go on, get going.

For the Next Two Weeks after - Chikezie or Dreadhead Jason Castro. Depends on who does better. (And, let it be known, I think Castro is super-cute)

Next - Syesha.

David Archuleta - PLEASE. I'm soooo over him. Yes, he's adorable and he's going to get this far ONLY because of the million screaming 13 year olds. Truth be told, I'd much rather him leave way earlier. Come on, the whole "... when I sing this song I just think of all the people in the world who don't have houses..." Need I say more?! "Someone" has a stage parent!

Michael Johns - I really like him a lot. I sure hope he gets to stay this long.

FINAL THREE!!
Carly, Brooke and David Cook.

I think the big upset is going to be Carly leaving first, and then Brooke and David Cook are going to be the final two.
And either of those I would be happy with!!

So there's my AI blog for the week. And the season for that matter!

Seacrest. out.

Reese and Carson sittin in a tree...

2008-03-24T15:33:00.000-06:00

It's American Idol time again!!!

2008-03-12T13:47:00.004-06:00

Finally all the auditions are over... The top twelve are here, and I'm so excited!
This is probably the first of many AI blogs to come just like last year when I was ranting over Antonella, Sanjaya and Haley (WHAT was all that about people?!).

So I missed the live show yesterday as I was in Houston working an event, so I'm in the midst of watching it today to catch up.

I have only watched two performances so far, Syesha, who I have loved until the last two shows... and Chikezie.
NEED I SAY MORE?!?!

CHIKEZIE literally brought me to tears because I was sooo excited for him and absolutely loving his performance. He was incredibly entertaining, his voice was outstanding and he was genuinely enjoying himself and sincere throughout the entire thing!! If you watched it I doubt you could disagree that he might have just landed himself in the final 2 or 3 just as a result of this performance.

Watching him afterwards during the judging, I was even more tearful because just hearing how the judges gushed over him and truly gained a huge amount of respect for him made me so genuinely excited!! Call me overly-emotionally invested, or call me a wagon-jumper... I don't care! I absolutely LOVE LOVE LOVE him!!! And I really hope that he keeps it up.
SURELY, some of you agree with me!!

My TOPS

2008-03-04T20:54:00.003-07:00

1. PRE-SCHOOL! I took Reesers for the first time today. She did so great! She ate all her lunch, slept on her nap mat (shocking to me) and all-around had a great time! I'm so proud of my baby girl.

2. Once - the movie, the soundtrack... I love it all. I was bawling in the first ten minutes, and I don't know why. It wasn't even sad crying, just tears that somehow forced their way out. Trust me, this is a keeper!

3. A Fine Frenzy - the new CD: One Cell in the Sea.

4. Eat, Pray, Love - fanatically reading through this book. It's so moving, and somehow can relate to millions and millions of women simultaneously. I've come to this realization b/c as soon as I started reading it, I've seen at least 5 or 6 women holding this book while out at the park, waiting at the doctors' office, etc.

5. Skinny Bitch - Despite feeling as though I'm being verbally abused by the foul=mouthed authors, this might be the one book that could snap me out of my junk-loving, veggie-loathing ways. Something has to! So far I've learned that aspartame is Satan and turns into formaldehyde once it gets into my body. I was drinking a Diet Dr. Pepper as I read along. =)

6. Across the Universe - the soundtrack. The movie was good, too, but the soundtrack is infinitely better.

7. Afrin nasal spray - I'm telling you, this is the one thing that has given me any relief for the past two weeks. Yet another thing Skinny Bitch is teaching me... This stuff is the last thing I should be shooting up my nose. Apparently my body is trying to communicate something to me. I'VE GOT IT!! Lets MOVE ON.

8. NPR's podcast: Wait, Wait Don't Tell Me... I've loved it forever, but I'm getting this close to flying my butt to Chicago for one Saturday visit to the Shrine Auditorium.

9. Sonic. I freaking love Sonic.

TTFN. =)

4404 as you've never seen it before!

2008-02-12T00:04:00.000-07:00

This is the official GOODBYE post. I know I know, there have been about 50... BUT, the deed is done. So, this must be the official tribute to 4404. Tears are shed, goodbyes have been said, and mom's all moved into the new place, and happy with it I ought to add. But for all of you who spent significant rites of passage in my beautiful childhood home, this is the house as you've never seen it. Now YOU can shed tears, too!!!

Looking down from the stairs over the Christmas morning room and dining room

My old room (tear)

This one seems to be the kicker... The family room. (big tear!)

Started off as the playroom, then the boys' room, then the guest room.

Mom and dad's room

Even Reese can sense the devastation! (or she's just throwing a tantrum b/c I won't let her go upstairs... you pick.)

FINAL photo session on the stairwell.

no time for the important things i suppose...

2008-01-30T00:02:00.000-07:00

At least lately...
So my parents home finally sold. I went to help my mom pack up the other day, walked in the door, and literally burst into tears. I admitted that I didn't think I was capable of going through with this dirty deed of packing up my childhood, teen-hood?, and college-hood...
My husband cannot really relate one smidgen to what I'm feeling because his family moved consistently throughout his life. I literally have a memory of nearly every corner, nook, cranny, crack, and baseboard of that house. Every single birthday of the last 23 years, nearly every Christmas... okay, I won't list every holiday, but that's about it. I still had the Homecoming mum that my 7th grade Homecoming date (whom I am great friends with he and his wife now - which makes it all the more hilarious) gave me hanging in my closet! I still have the (or HAD, since my mom is notorious for throwing things out) pink puff paint sweatshirt my BFF gave me in 3rd grade. It had a black puff paint teddy bear that said Best Buddies (AAhhh, the 80s... such class, such taste, such inability to recognize bad "crafty" clothing...) and it was also still hanging in my closet. BUT, OK, it's done. Time to move on...

Unfortunately, I have hardly been able to relish in the last few weeks of occupancy because I am currently "speaker-coordinating" a major conference. www.synergize.tv - check it out... yep, all 50 speakers. That's what I'm working on. So, I've successfully managed to ignore my daughter, miss out on packing up my history, and miss out on several good nights of sleep.

But it all ends this week. Thank the Lord!
Although, I lovah lovah love this kind of work.

Outy 5000.

SOLD!

2008-01-22T10:57:00.000-07:00

It's official. My parents will be out by the end of the week.
Can you say, "depressing"?!

Thank God for YouTube! (and children with British accents)

2008-01-19T22:28:00.001-07:00

Because this is the best laugh I have had in a long time!!!

Photo Booth Phun!!

2008-01-17T22:14:00.000-07:00

This is no help at all!

2008-01-11T10:13:00.000-07:00

So now I'm obsessed with finding out if I'm right or left-brained.
This is what I find:

Lindsay, you are Balanced-brained

That means you are able to draw on the strengths of both the right and left hemispheres of your brain, depending upon a given situation.

When you need to explain a complicated process to someone, or plan a detailed vacation, the left hemisphere of your brain, which is responsible for your ability to solve problems logically, might kick in. But if you were critiquing an art opening or coming up with an original way to file papers, the right side of your brain, which is responsible for noticing subtle details in things, might take over.

While many people have clearly dominant left- or right-brained tendencies, you are able to draw on skills from both hemispheres of your brain. This rare combination makes you a very creative and flexible thinker.

The down side to being balanced-brained is that you may sometimes feel paralyzed by indecision when the two hemispheres of your brain are competing to solve a problem in their own unique ways.

awesome. so basically I just get used to being paralyzed by indecision? or I should feel okay about that, because it is quite possibly a win-win situation depending on what kind of brain I feel like being that day?

Are you Right or Left Brained?

2008-01-08T16:27:00.000-07:00

Weird quiz I took just now.
It just popped into my head, wondering if I would be considered right or left-brained, so I looked it up and found this simple test: http://www.news.com.au/heraldsun/story/0,21985,22556281-661,00.html

I cannot imagine this dancer turning counter-clockwise at all. So I guess I'm right-brained?!

Starting off the New Year!

2008-01-03T22:28:00.000-07:00

I'm not even attempting to make New Years Resolutions yet. If indeed I even do.
Honestly, how many of those do you EVER end up keeping?! I can say, as a person with little discipline or self-control, that I did the best on my resolutions last year, than I have ever done. But this year has started off so strangely!

I am in a F-U-N-K. In pretty much every aspect right now.
I have absolutely NO motivation or inspiration to get my butt in gear and it is so entirely frustrating. Over the entire Christmas break I experienced agonizing bouts of insomnia, and they have not let up!! Usually I am perfectly okay with staying up late, reading, watching movies, and generally wasting time and totally enjoying it. But now, I just want to go.to.sleep. I'm hoping that my lack of motivation is DUE to this lack of sleep, however, if I actually engaged in some type of productivity, I would probably see a sharp decline in all "lacking" whatsoever. I'm not going to harshly discipline myself until I go through another entire week of slothful behavior. So, I'll let bygones be bygones for the next two days. But come Sunday, it's GAME ON. No more slacking.

Now on from the bad to the good.
Tonight I threw a wildly successful, although you'll just have to trust me because I forgot my camera!, surprise going away party! Terri has been a stalwart member of my parents' church for quite some time, and she has become an entirely different person from the first time I met her. She met the Lord, changed her life, and really is the epitome of how you would hope people in your church would respond when they meet Jesus and decide to plug into the church. I cannot begin to explain how dependable, amazing, and humble this woman is!! And she has been through things that I truly don't know I could have come out of. Anyways, she is moving to Florida, making changes and moving to the next phase of her life. She had NO idea that we were planning anything for her, and truthfully she probably didn't think people cared enough about her to bother!! But we partied her socks off tonight, and between everyone we gave her over $200 in a Target giftcard. It was awesome!!

One more good and noteworthy item...
This week I reconnected with a friend from my past who I have missed for YEARS!! I am so ecstatic to have her back in my life, and I just never thought it would happen. I love you and I so much look forward to catching up on the crazy amount of lifechanging things that have happened to us in the last four freakin' years!

OH and BY THE WAY, my beautiful, best-mother-in-the-world friend, Tarrah had her baby last Friday!! She's beautiful. Congratulations Tarr!!!

HAPPY NEW YEAR, FOLKS!

Best Gift Ever

2008-01-01T20:24:00.000-07:00

All meaningful and deep sentiments aside...
The best gift I got this year was the entire series of BBC's The Office.
Dear God this show is funny.

The American version does not even hold a candle.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!

Tennessee Christmas

2007-12-24T08:20:00.000-07:00

We decided to spend Christmas in Tennessee this year, much to my mother's chagrin... But I'm sure she's over it by now =).
Either way, we made the 13 hour drive on Thursday with surprising ease considering the energy levels of the toddler we tend to carry around with us. Whoever created the portable DVD player MUST have been a parent, but regardless he or she is a genius. Thanks to several rounds of Little Einsteins, Monsters Inc, and PraiseBaby we had a nearly tear-less, fuss-less drive!! Of course I have to say, no matter how thankful I am for the entertainment provided, there is something a little off-putting about seeing your toddler's glazed eyes and hanging jaw in the blue light of the TV screen!

We finally got to TN around 4:30 am and my little girl, despite being completely exhausted could not shake herself from the crazy blinking tree and crazy barking puppies. She was literally shaking from the combination of excitement, delirium and exhaustion. So I stayed up with her until about 9am till we were both passing out... Niles parents weren't going to be in town until the next day, so Grayson, Niles and I went to the mall (God forbid!) where they promptly decided to lose Reese as I was shopping! They were "watching" her while she played in one of those big foam-type play centers and next thing I know, as I'm walking back to get all of them, this strange woman walks up to me, angrily I might add, holding my daughter! In a shrill voice, with darts coming out of her eyes and steam blowing out her ears - wearing a shirt that said Jesus is the Reason for the Season (i'm exaggerating) - she asks me, "Is THIS YOUR CHILD?!?!". Quickly I grab my "rescued" daughter, close my phone whilst hanging up on my brother, and start yelling "Niles. Niles. Niles." - trying to act like I can't feel the judgment oozing out of Psycho Soccer Mom's pores. Niles and Grayson said they had been watching her closely, but she has the speed of a panther and dashed away before their very (dim) eyes.
Here is Reese, pre-panther-speed-display...
(with clearly no idea she is about to enter the scary jungle of the joyous Christmas shopping experience alone)

We ate at Abuelo's afterwards, drinking away our memories of nearly losing our daughter/niece in a couple rounds of Blue Moon beer. Later that night, Gray's friend Mark came over. We love him. He simultaneously drank a beer, talked about Mac computers with Niles, watched the Mavs game, and carried on a conversation about Lauren Conrad and The Hills with me. My kind of man!!! =) (P.S. Jackie, the Mavericks won on Friday. Just thought you would want to know!)

Saturday, waiting for Niles' parents to get in town, we went a played some tennis at the nearby park and took turns taking Reese out to the playground. Tennis is so much fun!!! It was ten times better working out by taking your aggression out on a bouncing ball than trying to run on a treadmill. With the exception of a few balls I hit out of the court and onto the street, I didn't play too poorly either, which was greatly satisfying to my highly competitive, lowly athletic personality. Reese had fun too, scraping a ball along the court with her racket.

Pure professional form here

The folks came in Saturday and we went, of course, to Cracker Barrel. Haven came in Sunday afternoon and we went again to Abuelos, where the Worst Service Ever competition must have been taking place... and our server WON!!! It was by far the worst service ever given to one group of people in the history of bad service. Not only did she forget to put our order in until about 30 minutes after we placed it, she never put my order in, and she never even regarded the fact that she had made a mistake. NOTE TO SERVERS OUT THERE EVERYWHERE: never, never, never, never pretend that you have no idea why our food would be taking so long and damn, that kitchen is so slow. NEVER. It's a bad, bad, tired act and makes you look irresponsible and just plain rude! Anyways, we had gotten to the restaurant at 1:30, and got home at 4. Need I say more?!?!

Since I forgot to blog about MY family's annual trip to the Galleria, here are a couple videos from that night, and then the video of Reese at the playground in TN.

Merry Christmas!!!!!

HILARIOUS

2007-12-19T00:13:00.000-07:00

Check it out.
If you love Superbad, or Arrested Development... or if you are itching to see Juno, like I am, you have to appreciate these "episodes" by Michael Cera and his buddy.

www.clarkandmichael.com

It's Official. I'm old.

2007-12-12T10:40:00.000-07:00

No longer a 20-something, I've moved into the next age bracket. sigh.
It has been an overwhelming month, trying to finish up school, work, and get all my freakin' dental problems taken care of. Finally, my little vacancy in the bottom corner of my mouth is starting to close up, I'm no longer on pain meds, and I'm slowly coming back to sanity. Last week was my 30th birthday! And of course, the day before my birthday was my major 10 -15 minute presentation for my final grade. So the 3 to 4 days leading up to my birthday were spent in utter mania just trying to get my topic and sort out all the information, etc. Im such a last minute person that I had not even decided on the topic of my presentation until the weekend before it was due. ANYWAYS, all that to say, I barely had time to think about my birthday or all the excitement it would be until the night before because I was so exhausted. And since it was the night before that I started thinking about it, of course I couldn't just fall asleep - so I was up until about 4:30am. nice.

My beautiful, wonderful friend Lauren, along with a couple other girls, planned a night out for me in Dallas. They booked a room at Hotel Zaza, which is amazing, and we were ushered around in a limo all night to go eat and go dancing. It was SUCH a good time. My oldest and closest friends were there, with a few exceptions, and they all got along great and we managed to have an entire girls night out without any clashing amongst the various personalities. =) THANKS GIRLS!!
Here are a small number of photos from Friday...

Me, Lauren, and my oldest friend, Jess who I've known since I was 8!!

My awesome cake!

Outside the limo...

Me and my perfect sister-in-law...

Saturday night my mom threw me a small get-together at her house... Actually, I thought it was supposed to be small, which is why I didn't really tell many people about it, but my mom had the house DECKED out!! But it seems neither of us remembered to tell many people either, since two of my aunts had no idea, and neither did my other sister-in-law!! =) BUT, that's okay because I know she had just wanted to have a special evening for me, and that was certainly successful!!
Here are a few pics from that night...

So, it's official. I'm completely old.

Reese and Grandad

2007-11-25T23:18:00.001-07:00

I have not posted any pictures of Reese in ages! And since our trip to Mexico, our camera has never been the same. SO, since the last time I got great pictures of Reese was when she was having a lengthy conversation with her grandad, that's what you get. And besides that, they are PRECIOUS pictures.

This year I'm thankful for...

2007-11-25T17:52:00.001-07:00

MY DENTIST!!
Oh my gosh it has been quite a week.
A week and a half ago I was having serious pain in one of my molars and found out I needed to have it pulled! And along with that, they wanted to pull that pesky wisdom tooth that was pushing in on that sweet little molar. So, on the weekend that I should have been driving to Houston for an old friend's wedding, I spent my time on the couch, ice pack to my swollen face, and a mouth full of gauze. Awesome. I was seriously disappointed because I was really looking forward to going to this wedding. So many of my friends that I never see anymore were going to be there and because I was high on codine for 48 hours, I missed out on all the fun. I'm so sad!! Well, I did finally resurrect myself to go to dinner with some friends on Monday night, and I chose to enjoy a margarita, the result of which would normally be a really happy buzzy feeling. Instead, I got a freakin' DRY SOCKET. Which, if you don't know what that is, let's sum it up like this: undeniable, throbbing, lifesucking pain. I don't know that I necessarily got the DS as a result of the margarita, because I did call my doctor to make sure it was okay... But since I had done everything humanly possible to keep myself from getting this horrendous infliction, that's the only conclusion I can come to.

So, Wednesday I went to my new dentist, who may end up dropping me shortly out of sheer annoyance with my never ending phone calls... (seriously it was almost as bad as how often I called the pediatrician after Reese was born - A LOT) He "packed" the socket with this foul-tasting medication and I went on my way, hoping against all hope that I was cured. Not. Happening. Thanksgiving day I managed to cope and still enjoy my holiday with our friends (our family event was Wednesday night) but I was popping pain meds every few hours. Finally Friday, on my poor dentist's day off no less, I was admitted to get some more medication which seemed to ease my pain for a while.

What a week!! I'm so thankful for my new dentist. They have graciously opened their offices to me several times this week, even though it was a holiday and they were SLAMMED. And they didn't charge me for any of the visits, which I'm so grateful for. If you need a dentist, Huckabee Dental in Southlake. That's where it's at, my friends.

Other than that, it has been a great holiday!!

UPDATE on the Cole home: still on the market. Sooo... looks like Christmas won't be as sad as I thought. =) YAY!

SHOUT OUT TO TARRAH Z!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY MY FRIEND!!!!

Home for the Holidays?!?! NOT.

2007-10-24T07:47:00.000-06:00

SO. Since putting the 22-Year-Cole-Family-Dreamhouse on the market last weekend, mom and dad have had a steady stream of visitors all week long last week, followed by a very successful Open House on Sunday. They have had two offers already and finally decided to accept one of them. Which is semi-good news. The facts are, no matter what they are moving and it might as well be sooner than later. I think for my mom, it would be easier to just cut the cord and go. But at the same time, the news that they are being asked to be out BEFORE THANKSGIVING I think is tough to take. It's at least extremely tough to take for ME!! I spent the hour before falling asleep last night trying to figure out what to do with myself while I cried my eyes out. I'm not a big touchy-feely kind of person, so when I cry, the last thing I want is to be hugged or touched. I'd prefer to cry on my own and not be messed with... Which left Niles in a bit of a quandary. Poor guy. I think he was digging through our junk drawer for my old therapist's number. just in case. I thought, okay, I'll sit in bed, cry somewhat silently, while listening to my iPod and looking at magazines. Unfortunately, that was not at all therapeutic. So, I just caved and went to sleep to the sound of Wedding Crashers. What... does that not seem appropriate? What's more therapeutic than Vince Vaughn?!

Today I was watching Larry King Live about the California fires, and realized I actually know a lot of people in San Diego that I have not checked in on! So, I emailed my friend Janie, and got the news back from her that they are all okay and safe. Although, she did let me know that they did have to go pack up valuables from her parents' house... (yes, my friend, I do know that you're probably reading this. I'm RELIEVED and so happy to know you are okay!!!!!) So, her brother, Josh, who is on my blogroll just to your right, has pictures from his driveway of the fires in the distance. It's extremely tough to look at, and it certainly gave me some perspective. All I could think of was how it would not be possible to look out your window and get back in bed peacefully... What a terrifying feeling.

As I continued watching LKL, they interviewed another news reporter who actually watched his house burn down. I think his name was Larry Himmel. Anyways, it was really tragic to hear him talk about - while seeing his completely destroyed home in the background - how he was standing in the driveway where he used to pitch baseballs to his son, and kiss his wife as he left for work everyday. He lived in that home for 25 years, and in the span of a few hours, he lost so much of the tangibility of his memories... I just completely lost it. It occurred to me how grateful I should be that even though we are leaving the home I grew up in, the home we have owned for 22 years, at least we are leaving it with all our memories in tact. All our belongings in place, the basketball goal from 15 years ago still there, the driveway where I found my first car tied with a ribbon (yes, i was spoiled) still there, and the huge front windows where our Christmas tree has always been on display going nowhere. Yes, the new people may take the goal down, yes, they may cut all the ivy off the house, change the landscaping (please!!), keep different cars in the driveway, and perhaps they won't have their Christmas tree in the front windows, but it will still be there. I can always drive by (and I probably will - so watch yourself newbies!!) and check in on it.

So, all that to say, I'm ridiculously sad about the fact that we will never have another Christmas morning on Shady Creek, but so many others are suffering the loss of their homes in a much worse way, and I'm extremely sad for those people, but grateful that I can take away this small comfort and I hope that doesn't seem selfish, but it's true.

I'm on a new mission to find out how we can possibly help those in California who are without homes, and if anyone has any ideas, let me know!!

Issues

2007-10-17T13:22:00.000-06:00

My brother read my rant about the yellow pages commercials (below) and said I have anger issues I need to work on. =)

He is possibly correct!!

Right now I have several issues with varying degrees of emotional exertion. The first of which is the completion of my dad's conference. Christian Men's Network, the ministry my grandfather started in 1977, just celebrated its Thirtieth Anniversary. Not only was it our anniversary, but it was somewhat of a relaunching of the ministry for my dad. It has been a long hard, emotional experience, transitioning the ministry from my grandfather's hands to my father's, and not one without many questions that start with "Why...?". The conference was a smashing success, giving my dad the exact kind of encouragement and momentum he needed and the ministry needed and it also marked my debut as an all-around event coordinator, in charge of everything from volunteers (finding, scheduling, reigning in), speakers, transportation, facility liasing (word??), hotels(reservation management is probably the MOST TIME-CONSUMING aspect of any event I have ever participated in. It's certainly not a one-person job if you want to do it right!!), registration, money handling, yadda yadda yadda. It has been an extremely overwhelming summer getting ready for this event, and while I'm relieved it's over, it was also encouraging to me once the event came to a close, to realize that I had pulled it off, with minimal mistakes, and lots of ideas for next time. =) But I have to give MAJOR "props" to my friend Amy, who was my right hand for the entire thing and without her, I might have been in the fetal position in the corner of the lobby. ALL THAT TO SAY, it's taking me a good few weeks to recover from the sleep deprivation and hype. I'm exhausted.

Another huge event taxing my emotions is the big FOR SALE sign in the front yard of my parents' home. The home I lived in and have at least been to on a daily basis for the last 22 years of my life. It's my childhood home, the one where I had my 16th birthday, my 10th birthday, my 8th birthday!!! The home where every major event of my life has been celebrated, every holiday has been had, every going-away party, coming-home party, along with many and many baby showers, wedding showers, and any major playoff watching parties have been had, and not even just for me... for a churchful of people, for all my friends, for all of my brother's friends... This is the house that my daughter took her first steps in, had her first birthday in, went swimming for the first time at... The thought of not celebrating another Christmas in this house, is no less than gutwrenching. With the exception of a small handful of my friends, we've lived in this house longer than most people I know have ever lived in one place, maybe even one city! I am so torn up about the whole thing. But the worst is watching my mom go through it all. If you know my mom, you know you can't even guess how many layers of paint may be on each wall - how many times the counters have been redone, the cabinets have been painted, the color scheme has been changed. If you know my mom, you know that her home is a reflection of herself. It's her escape, her passion... I know it seems ridiculous to be writing on and on about this, but if you know me, and you know my family, you have been to our home countless times and probably have several precious memories of your own. Because that's how much we have loved and shared this house. I will have to post pictures later purely for preservational purposes. It is rough. Very very rough.

Anyways, just thought I would share.
I am not good at venting my emotions and so trying to keep calm during all of this is very difficult, but I know my problems are extremely small in the face of so many others'... So maybe blogging about it all will help.

Absolutely Absurd

2007-10-11T22:44:00.001-06:00

You know what annoys me lately??
The absurd AT&T yellow pages phone book commercial.
What overpaid geniuses sat in a room and thought of a
marketing concept for a PHONE BOOK that entails a
jingle sung by people who simply cannot wait!, are so
excited!, are on the edge of their seats waiting for,
looking for...
their new yellow pages book.

Can I just tell you, the absolute LAST thing (aside
from Mormons or people ("single" moms, yeah right)
selling outlandishly overpriced magazine
subscriptions) I want on my doorstep, is a BIG ASS
YELLOW PAGES BOOK. I despise those things. All they do
is make me feel guilty because I don't recycle them
when I finally drag their dust-covered, still wrapped
in plastic, selves out of my closet to finally throw
them away.

Whew.
I feel better now.

Just a little gift from my sister in law...

2007-09-28T17:42:00.001-06:00

And a perfect time to post considering it's
1. My 100th Post!!
2. STRESSFUL TIMES
3. 72 hours until my conference starts!!! oh jeez.

Here's a little taste of what me and some girlfriends do on our weekends. =)

Finally... Wiggles pictures!

2007-09-18T21:10:00.001-06:00

Me and a super-cool toddler walking up to the theater.

Captain Feathersword and Dorothy, her favorite!

Dorothy the dinosaur

with her new Dorothy doll

with her Wiggles program. She is obsessed with this
book. She will lay on her stomach and read it forever.

So cool. =)

Again, days later, reading her program with daddy on the couch.

I love this.

2007-09-14T15:02:00.001-06:00

And, NO, I'm not pregnant. =)

so tired

2007-08-29T13:43:00.001-06:00

I have been so exhausted lately that I very nearly
feel the need to buy a pregnancy test! Getting in bed
at 9:30, falling asleep before 10:30.. this is so
completely unlike me. I am, in fact, so tired right
now, that I hear Reese making a lot of racket behind
me (which is actually far less scary than her total
silence, which usually is a sign that she is into
something terribly inappropriate) and I'm having a
hard time even looking around, for fear that I may
have to actually get up out of my chair. This is not
good.

It's one of those days where I could literally sit in
one place, in a total daze, and feel completely okay
about that. Normally I don't like to sit still unless
there's a magazine, book, or puzzle in front of me, as
well as a movie going or music playing... and I can't
help but think of all the things I should be doing.

I'm wondering if it's possible that my poor diet is
contributing to my tiredness... but there's nothing
different in my diet now than there has been for...
forever! So, what's the deal?!?!

If I took a pregnancy test today and it turned
positive, I could very nearly promise you that Niles
would go take a close look at his protection
collection to see if I'd "tampered" with it. That's
how much of a shock it would be.

Okay. I really must find out the source of all the
racket going on behind me. Sounds like videotapes
being haphazardly ripped out of their cases and tossed
aside for sport.

It is.

Mommy Tip

2007-08-28T08:38:00.001-06:00

Okay. This is going to seem a little random, but
anytime I find a good money-saving or time-saving
mommy tip, I think it should be shared.

Target diapers.

As any parent knows, a major budget-sucker are (is?)
diapers. I'm always a little weary of cheap brands
because usually you get what you pay for... and
diapers are one thing you should not be scared to
spend money on.

But I got a Target box of 92 diapers for $13!!!! I've
been on the same box for over a week and a half now
and we have had no leakage, no accidents, no wet crib
mattress... So, I'm sold. AND, no diaper rash... don't
let me forget that important issue. I'm so excited.

I've used Walmart brand diapers and "parents choice"
diapers... They all suck. Not Target.

If you know me, you know I'm a little fanatic about
Target... Im trying to wean myself off of my daily
trip as it's a little embarrassing because now the
staff always recognize me. I'm sure they sit and talk
about me in the break room like "hey, crazy Target
girl came back in today and you know what she
bought??" Embarrassing.

Big Day!!

2007-08-25T09:37:00.001-06:00

Today is Reese's first concert.
Who is it you ask? The Strokes? U2? Fergie? no.
Only the most.talented. most. innovative. group. of. all. time.
THE WIGGLES!!
We are Racing to the Rainbow today, guys. It is Reese's highlight of the day when I turn on the TV (which I try to do increasingly less, as I want my child to have some semblance of imagination and creativity on her own someday) and she hears that familiar refrain all of us parents know and "love"... "It's the Wiggles, it's the Wiggles, dancing with our friends..."
I have to say honestly, I am a bit excited myself seeing as I pretty much watch the show just as much as Reese and now feel some emotional attachment to the four colorful fellas. I have turned to them in some dark times. Times when I thought I could never get Reese to calm down, or stop crying, or help me figure out what was wrong; times when I felt the world closing in on our tiny apartment as I racked my brain thinking of ways I could help her. These are the Wiggle times. When the Wiggles are on, Reese's world comes to a stop. She sits down, stops crying, pulls her blankie on to her lap (or if she's happy, she dances and claps along with the songs) and gives mom a few moments' rest and recuperation. Or at least 30 minutes to get something done. Hopefully she won't die of shock when she sees Jeff (the purple guy) running around in the crowd. And he better... because that's what they show on TV and I am counting on grabbing onto his hips and starting a major conga line. Bet they'll show THAT on tv.

disclaimer: For all you parents out there who are thinking of challenging me over the use of TV to help calm my child down... don't bother. I don't care what you think. =)

Technology + Me= Dammit.

2007-08-22T20:47:00.001-06:00

Well, it's been a good two months since I last
blogged. For some friggin reason, every time I would
log in to start a new post, it would give me some
error message saying that my template was invalid?!
Who knows. Me and electronic devices do not mesh well.
I am literally known at every office I have ever
worked at, for messing up the one computer that is
supposed to withstand any and all viruses, bugs, and
nuclear disasters that come its way. Except me. I am
the indestructible, walking, breathing virus.

But I must say, I have an old Mac at the office that I
am now using, (all because, of course, my previous PC
caught some sort of pop-up disease; one resembling the
end of solitaire when all the cards start bouncing all
over the screen... except the popups don't go away or
deal again) and thus far, knock on wood, have had no
issues!! Go Mac!!

So far this year, I have successfully destroyed one
Mac laptop, one PC laptop, and a PC desktop. In that
order. Why? Just for kicks. Just because I always
hoped my life would be more difficult, more complex,
less efficient or organized. I started off the year
feeling just a bit too on top of things, ya know?

Here are a few other things I have accomplished
technologically:

1. Orlando, Florida, circa August 2005 - hurricane
season, lots of thunder and lightning storms. All the
computers and basically all general electronics at my
office building are on a backup system. All but one.
All but the measly little crapper I had in my cubicle
on the second floor, left wing of the building on the
right. That's right. Everyone else was up and running
in seconds. Not me. It took me a team of Campus
Crusade "tech specialists" to keep trading out
computers till finally they settle on one they thought
might withstand Hurricane Lindsay.

2. Dallas, TX, Thanksgiving break, 2005 - Outlook, all
mail systems, all programs successfully running before
I go to Tennessee for holiday. All mail programs
unsuccessfully running when I return, and thus never
returned to proper working order. Ever.

3. Dallas, TX, circa February 2007 - large printer
stops working. Just. stops. And it costs a good 500
dollars just for a diagnostic?! Are you kidding? I
guess I didn't realize it ran on Kia parts.

4. Mac laptop - have used consistently for the last
three years. Stopped working during midterms of my
first class back in college. awesome.

5. PC laptop - used simply to fill in for the Mac
laptop for a month or so. Quit working the night
before my research paper was due.

6. PC desktop, office, two months ago - Pop up
infestation.

There you have it. A short history of my computer
shortcomings. Why do people always buy me such crappy
computers??

test

2007-08-21T09:42:00.001-06:00

adsl;fmas;dlmf;alsmdf

Back and Being Vulnerable!

2007-06-28T17:04:00.000-06:00

Well, my amazing, intelligent, hilarious, beautiful, Lohan-esque cousin, Holland, left today for Syracuse Journalism la-di-dah school. We have always been good friends and we always have fun together... mostly because she humors me and puts up with my below-her intelligence and wit, not to mention my love for wine and chaotic personality. But she left today, and even though I had ample time to spend with her over the last 2.5 years since the move home from Florida, we did not hang out NEARLY as much as I would have liked!!! And now I'm mad at myself!!

I realize that we are family, and we will always be close and together and in touch somehow, but it's not quite the same as spending time together.

I do this all the time!!

I am extremely awful at keeping in touch. Not extremely awful, but pretty bad. I LOATHE talking on the phone. I get lazy with emails, and write things like, "cute! love it. miss you." And even MySpace cannot hold me in its trance anymore. Believe me, friends and family are not insignificant to me by any means... So am I just insensitive? Lazy? Tired? Self-involved? I dont know. But it's definitely not a good thing. And I certainly never mean to make people (especially people I care about deeply!) feel as if I don't care enough about their lives to take two minutes out of mine and call them up. It's terrible. I'm sure I've blogged about this before, and surely many of these will follow... But this is a tribute to Holland.

I am SO stinkin' proud of you!!!
You are such an amazing person... I, truthfully, am always learning things from you... And not just things about superficial celebrities and reality shows. (Although that's true, too)
You have experienced so much in your life that I am envious of, and I'm glad you get to tell me stories about it, because then I can tell them to Reese, and together we can explain to her the 100 most Stupid things to do in a Relationship, the 100 Best Places to Go, the 100 Places to go where certain experimental substances are okay... (well, you can tell her that one) JUST KIDDING!!!
But seriously, I think you are terrific and talented and special. I believe in you and I think you are taking a risk that will ultimately pay off, and I can't wait for you to dedicate your first book to me.
One last thing...
BURN THAT DRUNK DANCE VIDEO WE MADE IN MY FLORIDA APARTMENT PARKING LOT.
Or I will release the cassette tape we made at Grandma and Grandpa's. Oh yeah. Be afraid.

SO, to all of you who don't know my soon-to-be-famous, soon-to-be-literary-prize-winning cousin, you can check out her blog at
www.lifeisthat.blogspot.com

She is A-W-E-S-O-M-E.

Made my day!

2007-06-12T11:03:00.001-06:00

Am I crazy that this made me cry?!?

Pictures... finally!

2007-05-24T19:36:00.001-06:00

Since I've been so terrible about blogging, and picture uploading, and pretty much everything beyond simply checking my emails... (and yes, that does mean i've even been terrible at responding to emails...) I have a lot of photos to share.

First and foremost, my dear friend, Jen is getting married to the guy she's been with for like 8 years. FINALLY! So, my friends from high school and I are all flying up to Missouri at the end of June for the big event. We had her shower in April and some of these girls I had not seen in AGES.
Here's all of us at the "bachelorette party" (i.e. dinner at Mi Cocina)

Me and the bride to be!

Here's the girls at the shower:

The all-important cake that I was put in charge of... It was a terrifying experience! Picking out just the right cake for a shower... I'm not normally up for that task, and it was much bigger than me. =)

Okay. Now onto more important things... Namely, Reese:

Back in the cupboard again...

Despite this look on her face, she truly is a fan...

And finally, dinner wth friends.

And let me leave you with this final thought.

Where have I been?!?!

2007-05-22T07:48:00.000-06:00

WOW... I have not blogged in a long time. Maybe it was the emotional hangover of depression from the Mavericks loss... I will say, unabashedly, that I did bawl my eyes out when Dirk won his MVP trophy last Tuesday. I just love him so much. I literally sat in the car, listening to the entire press conference on the radio, and then watched it on TV later that day. He looked so sweet in his little suit. =) Although, I don't know that you can call anything worn by a 7-ft man "little".

Well, I FINALLY finished my first semester back at school!! I have to say, I picked the absolute worst time in life to try to go back. Life is complex enough right now, with work, children, family, church, etc. But, throwing in school?!?! What was I thinking?! I'll tell you what I was thinking... DEGREE... MONEY... CAREER... SETTING UP GOALS... FINISHING GOALS... Trying to do the right thing for myself and my future. I just could have done it a little earlier... Say, 8 years ago when I was actually still enrolled and on campus? Oh well. That's life. But I ended up getting a B+ in one class, and an A in the other, so I guess I did well enough.

Last Friday I left with my cousin Seth to drive down to Corpus Christi to run a relay marathon called the Beach to Bay Relay. We got asked to join a team who needed to fill a few spots. I was trying to get out of it, but I'm so glad I didn't and that I actually made the trip and ran the race. I got stuck with the longest leg (4.8 miles) but I ran the whole thing, and did it in 40 minutes, too! So, I'm happy with that. The only infuriating thing was the ABUNDANCE of San Antonio Spurs fans EVERYWHERE. I'm telling you, I'm a die-hard Mavs fan, but S.A. fans put us TO SHAME!!! (well, not me... but the rest of y'all)

Anyways, here are some pictures... I knew none of these people before this weekend, but there's nothing like building a bond over a little sweat, heat, and baton-passing. =)
Here's our team: (me, Seth, Eva, Jason, Monica, and Joe)

Me and Monica (the ringleader of the whole thing... She's a big marathon runner):

Here's me walking to drop some of our team off at their bus to take them to their first leg: (pointless picture truly)

Here's Eva handing off the baton at her exchange spot:

That's about it. Unfortunately I have no pictures of me running or handing off my baton because we were all spread out, and I didn't bring my camera. It was truly an inspiring experience and very encouraging. I'm thinking I may go ahead and start marathon training!! I'm telling you, the adrenaline at that thing was so contagious. If anyone's interested in joining me, let me know!!! =)

I can't take this!!

2007-04-30T15:51:00.000-06:00

NBA Playoffs 2007.
This was supposed to feel like Christmas! It was supposed to be simple, easy, and quick! Who are these Golden State Warriors we are playing? I for sure have not seen them this year.
This was OUR YEAR!!!

I'm so devastated over this first round of the playoffs for the Dallas Mavericks. I'm sick over it. I just cannot believe that we are down 3-1 right now, and have to win 3 straight games over this team in order to get into the second freaking round.

I'm not mad at them. I'm just mad. And I'm sad and embarrassed for them, because this is not the team they have been all year. Their legacy should not be set in stone as the only NBA team in history to lose their first place status in the first round of the playoffs!!!

If you're not a basketball fan, a sports fan, or especially a Mavs fan, then you probably think it's ridiculous that Ive spent so much time mourning these losses. But for some reason, it just really feels crappy. I want them to win so badly...

I realize they are not playing as well as normal, and I also realize that the Warriors are playing exceptionally more outstanding than they have for this entire year. But that doesn't soften the blows. I'm thinking of their reputations. It's just NOT STINKIN' FAIR.

I am a dedicated Mavs fan, and nothing that happens at the conclusion of this season will change that. If anything, I will show MORE support and MORE dedication!! But, I can't hide the disappointment. It's just gutwrenching.

On Alec Baldwin

2007-04-20T12:04:00.000-06:00

First of all, I've always thought that he seemed like a jerk. So no matter what, my opinion of him is more or less just confirmed by the recent incident of his.

Second of all, I realize that this is ridiculous that I'm making time to comment...
BUT.

I'm sorry. If I were his ex-wife, and he was calling up my ELEVEN-year-old daughter and yelling at her like that, you better believe I'd be telling everyone!! Especially if he were famous.

She's E-LEVEN!! Hello?!?!?

Let's Think About This for A Brief Moment...

2007-04-18T13:51:00.000-06:00

"The procedure at issue involves partially removing the fetus intact from a woman's uterus, then crushing or cutting its skull to complete the abortion."

This is an excerpt from an article I just read about the Court upholding, thankfully, the ban on partial birth abortion. Let me rephrase the above sentence with the appropriate verbiage:

"The procedure at issue involves partially removing the BABY intact from a woman's uterus, then crushing or cutting THE BABY'S skull to complete the abortion."

Really. Does that seem like something that should even be up for discussion? Much less made legal??

Ironic that April just happens to be National Child Abuse Prevention Month.

I am so disgusted by the fact that someone could even try to legitimize this procedure, and turn it into something "positive". What's even more sickening is that the ban was only upheld by a 5 to 4 vote.

Sad. So, instead of just choosing not to have sex with someone whose baby you don't want let's just crush its skull to make your life more convenient. HOW IS THIS DIFFERENT FROM THE TEENAGER WHO GETS HER BOYFRIEND TO JUMP ON HER STOMACH TO KILL HER BABY?????? She was on Oprah having the whole world gasp at her inhumanity. Are we going to do that with the doctors who perform this "surgery"???

(Understand here, I realize that some people choose to have abortions because of pregnancy due to rape or molestation, etc. But statistics show that those numbers are STAGGERINGLY minimal compared to those who are choosing abortion because it doesn't fit into their current lifestyle. Look it up before you decide to throw that argument at me. Even then, it still doesn't justify the means I'm talking about.)

Mere Christianity...

2007-04-09T10:29:00.000-06:00

The one good thing about my fake Intro to Adult Education class, (which is really a way of asking while simultaneously substantially charging me for this elaborate means of introspection... "You may be an adult, make a living, have a career and parent little future adults, but do you really know what you're talking about and are you worthy of getting a degree?") is that I am forced to read a little Christian philosophy. Which I always pretend I would love to read, but if I did really want to read it I would have done so... So, for my research paper which is due Thursday, I'm reading Mere Christianity by C.S. Lewis.

What a genius.

Today's gem: (on the topic of pride vs. 'proud of')
"To love and admire anything outside of yourself is to take one step away from utter spiritual ruin; though we shall not be well so long as we love and admire anything more than we love and admire God."

"...if you really get into any kind of touch with Him you will, in fact, be humble - delightedly humble, feeling the infinite relief of having for once got rid of all the silly nonsense about your own dignity which has made you restless and unhappy all your life."

On the topic of faith:
"Now Faith, in the sense in which I am here using the word, is the art of holding on to things your reason has once accepted, in spite of your changing moods. For moods will change, whatever view your reason takes... Now that I am a Christian I do have moods in which the whole things looks very improbable: but when I was an atheist I had moods in which Christianity looked terribly probable... unless you teach your moods 'where they get off,'you can never be either a sound Christian or even a sound atheist, but just a creature dithering to and fro, with its beliefs really dependent on the weather and the state of its digestion. Consequently one must train the habit of Faith."

What Just Happened Here?

2007-04-04T22:22:00.000-06:00

I'm sorry...

I'm in a bit of a daze... I just finished watching tonight's results episode of American Idol. Or did I? I'm still waiting for Ryan to come back on and say it was all a big practical joke. I mean, considering they can't air on April Fools Day, maybe tonight was their only night to play any practical jokes. After all, he never did say "Seacrest.Out." So it can't possibly be over...

Or am I truly just reeling in the unbelief of Sanjaya and Haley sliding by once more into safety?!?! Is this really happening?

What.the.hell.

Many "props" to Gina. For being awesome. I'm sorry you got a bum deal tonight.

Let's just pretend that Sanjaya and Haley don't exist. And if they continue to remain on the show, that's the only way to stomach the whole debacle. Or we (I'm saying "we" here, because I'm assuming you are all on my side. Because you're good, caring, thoughtful, TASTEFUL and awesome) will need to spend the two hours following Tuesday night's show on the phone, voting continuously for the 6 remaining good singers. I'll let you know the verdict after next Wednesday.

Till next week's rant...